Once In A Mundane Life

An experiment.

In a plaguing stream

of constant thought,

we forget

to remember

what has to be done.

Trying to hold

in empty hands--

there's already 

something there,

maybe 

the clairvoyant children

can see it.

Lackluster lives

of mundane things.

Whatever was once

important

has been given away

or stored

in the attic.

Author's Note

HA! I'm trying to use bigger words in poems, and working on a more detached way of bringing in my ideas. I don't really know if it's working or not. Hahahaha. Oh well. And, this kind of wrote itself, at first I didn't even know what the hell I was writing.

Reviews

[The Great Brain]

If you ask me, you really don't need big words to convey an idea (if you've ever read my short story "The Chameleon", you would know that). Honestly, I believe you're a better writer than you say you are. Anyways, enough of my stupid ramblings. Getting down to business, you really take quite a big look at a big idea (bad adjectives, I know). Everyone is always so rushed in their lives, trying to get everything done, and never resting (especially in the big cities). People work all day, trying to sort out what has to be done, but they don't realize that what has to be done is enjoy life instead of rushing through it, savoring every moment. Even the smallest children understand this, but it's a sad thing that the idea is lost as people grow older. Then, once they grow too old, they finally realize it, but there's nothing left to savor. A bit sad, if you ask me. Your writing style is very unique (in a good way). Great job. Now, pardon me while I go catch butterflies in the backyard.

[Alm]

Thank you, again :) I appreciate this so much. Hooray! You got the meaning of the poem.

read moreThank you, again :) I appreciate this so much. Hooray! You got the meaning of the poem.

People try so hard to do something, to achieve something, to get to something--that they forget that they had their dreams, the dreams they had as children.

Be sure to let the butterflies go, though, they have their short beautiful lives to live :)

-Alm

[Debbie_Philly]

A very deep piece for your age... well for any age really.... I really like this piece allot Alm... well done !!! :)

[Alm]

Thank you so much :)

[Dr. Wood ?]

It is difficult for an Englishman to review an American because we simply spell differently..I loved the end of this...quite dramatic....Poets always seem to have the words find them instead of the other way around...At 14...with your attitude...you should keep writing...this is not so bad

[Alm]

I'm not American at all, it's just that the country that I live in uses American English :) Thank you for the review, it's very appreciated!

[Alm]

and, I actually thought of the ending as a quietly powerful ending. Though it may come off as dramatic as well.

[Dr. Wood ?]

just keep writing