A Sunset

Im looking at the sunset

While walking around town

Looking at the moon and the stars 

Shining so bright 

They give me hope

but also make me sad

Thinking im looking at them

without someone by my side 

There , right there

at the furthest point in the horizon 

I look with a feeling of sadness approaching

me and you can see that in my eyes

It always happens like this 

When i think of you each time

i look at the sunset 

Such full of hope and a wave of melancholy 

Always deep inside me.

Reviews

[emmajoy]

Words are to hold back or release. Far better the latter because, hopefully, it makes a body feel less alone and who knows, the missing someone might at some time, feel your words whispering into his or her ear. Your words are sad but so finely written.

[Intothemilkyway]

I really enjoyed your review my dear. Im so happy to hear such things :) really made my day.

[emmajoy]

Your words although sad, are beautifully phrased.

[barleygirl]

I'm sorry if I've called you out on this before, but you might know I hate when a poet cannot celebrate some beautiful aspect of life just becuz someone "special" is not by his/her side. I really can't stand such misplaced dependency. What about all the other amazing people on this planet, some of whom might be enjoying your very observations in writing? Why aren't your readers special enuf to make this word foray worthwhile? Those who think life can't be savored until there's someone "special" by his/her side -- these people are throwing away the best moments of life becuz we almost never get to be by the side of those we wish we could be beside! Your poem is well-written & it expresses the feelings of many people (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Intothemilkyway]

Thank you for such a lovely comment Margie. You are very right so. I do write happy poems but most of them are sad and show the ugly part of what one holds inside. Those feelings you never express and hide.
Im very fond of the emotion of being sad. That's why most of my poems rotate around it. I make sure the reader feels and is reminded of something maybe forgotten but that it turned out beautifully.

[Eilis]

You have the sun, moon and stars all together, and in the same way you have the hope and sadness together. To feel two things at once is sometimes quite difficult because it keeps us from moving on.

But your hope in the poem seems to be similar to the understanding that the sun will always come back around and shed light on everything. There is always another day, and in the meantime—the beauty before us. Such a positive outlook on the pain. Yes, it hurts, but there are many things above and in front of us that can temper the pain and help us to move on. That is what your poem says to me. I really enjoyed this.

[Intothemilkyway]

Truly you grasped everything so wonderfully.
I wouldn't even have found the words to say such wonderful things for my own poems.

I really enjoy reading such reviews.

[pinhead07]

I enjoyed reading this. The moon and the stars are wondrous to gaze at, but for those of us who’ve loved and lost, they also bring with them sadness and solitude, in my case, insomnia too.
"Im looking at the sunset" You meant to write "I'm"
"Thinking im looking at them" Same.
"There , right there" You gave an extra space.
"It always happens like this" I'd write "It always happens"
"When i think of you each time" I'd write "When I think of you, each time"
"Such full of hope and a wave of melancholy" I'd write "So full of of hope and a wave of melancholy"
"Always deep inside me." Just writing "Always" would've been fine.

[Intothemilkyway]

I accept your critics about the things you said. I enjoy how others perceive my poems and the things they got to say. Of course id want feedback just like others.
But for others that know me here much longer, they know that i have a specific style on how i write things.
It's just my own way.
It wouldn't make sense if id change the way i write.
It just isn't me. Hope you understand.

[pinhead07]

Sure, I understand :))

[Jibey]

Dreamy romanticism! Sometimes that feeling of longing can be a real ache.. sometimes it is a sweet pleasure. Nice words, milky, sweet sadness.

[Intothemilkyway]

Thanks Jibey . Loved this nice review of yours

[Unspoken poet]

such a sad write, but so well expressed

[Intothemilkyway]

I wanted something different. This wasn't my best to be honest. Im very disappointed by this poem.read moreI wanted something different. This wasn't my best to be honest. Im very disappointed by this poem.
But i still wanted to put it out there.

[Unspoken poet]

it's the feelings that matter, expressing oneself is okay to do

[Intothemilkyway]

Yes i certainly agree.