Illusions

Is this you giving up?
You choose now to end it?
Didn't you know how hard I fought
So we could keep this?

You know, I believed you.
I believed you when you said you cared;
That what you felt was, for once, true,
And nothing could compare.

Please tell me, what happened?
Did I do something wrong?
Was it something I said?
Was it something I lost?

You're still absent from my presence,
and I think that's the problem.
What was once strong and confident,
Has now made its way to the bottom.

Wasn't it going so well?
We really made it far,
And how quickly I fell,
What's there to end when it never got to start?

Please don't leave me now,
You showed me how to live life
So spontaneous and proud
So why would I want to say goodbye?

"You're perfect," you said,
"Almost everything about you is."
Did you forget?
Or am I too much of a risk?

Oh how I wish I could call you,
To demand you speak your mind.
What do you want me to do
When we're yet to be defined?

I'm breaking at the cracks,
But you know I deserve the truth.
Just tell me what we lack
Before I let myself sulk over you.

I just don't understand
Why you choose now to leave.
Or are you leaving? Just be a man
And stop playing games with me.

I could say if you go,
That I'm better off without you.
But I think we're both smart enough to know
That's wretchedly not true.

I'm sorry if I'm jumping to conclusions,
But I have a heart to look after.
I don't want any more illusions
Since the one before you took my laughter.

No more games, no more tests.
My mind is not a toy;
I'm not here to play and guess.

I just want you.
Isn't that enough?
Everything I've confessed is true,
It's not time to act tough.

Just don't give up now
Please, not now
Yes, I admitted I'm not heartless.
Aren't you proud?

Author's Note

Sometimes we need to let our feelings out. The in between stage of not knowing if the other person is still in it for you, and the feeling of not knowing sucks. You feel like you're being placed on a string and doing whatever they say and want. You still want to be with them, but you're not into playing games anymore. It's either now or never...

Reviews

[GreenSkeleton16]

I HATE when you feel like this. why do men like to play games? its so childish.

[Undying Glory]

yep one should spit those feelings out once in a while. this was good work, i sure like what you've written here. it just saddens me when guys and girls alike try to be controlling. kind of brings to mind the question whether their self-esteem is so low, if they have to do things like that to appear good in a relationship. and whenever they just try to call it quits just like that. great job!

[Kelsie Eileen Stark]

You left questions to be answered- that's something poems need sometimes. Beautiful job

[Lachenille Papillion]

you captured that side of the heart with beautiful care, Hannah. This is palpable and etching, the picture bleeding in shades of gray upon the page...