New Primitives

I was driving along, and The Cult came on the radio with the song "Fire Woman". Somehow my brain saw the images in the poem.

Jonus brings the starter

Freya brings the wood.

We all bring desire

shouting like we should.

First we shed our clothes

then put leather 'round our loins.

To seperate us from those

who use gas, phones, and coins.

Josie has brought the water

to give head and bellies fire

Jason makes the slaughter

placing meat upon the pyre.

We laugh out loud and drink

as the flames sizzle fat

We all feel, instead of think

and night discourages chat.

The sparks fly toward the stars

the smoke carries them aloft

Toward Venus and toward Mars

with them our souls will waft.

The liquid heat is burning

each heart and mind and soul

We dance together churning

becoming parts of a whole.

we dance to forget the meaning

of electric bricks and glass

We replace it with the feeling

of trampled earth and grass.

and when our moon is fading

and the sun, again, comes back

We sleep in the tree's shading

and our souls no longer lack.

Tomorrow we'll drop leather

for ties, and shoes, and cotton

We won't mind about the weather

but our dance won't be forgotten.

Reviews

[Kristin Lee]

Makes me think of the Oregon Country Fair. Great imagery and very clear thoughts. Good job!

[Mark]

Ya? People in leather loin clothes dancing around fires, getting drunk, and eating killed animals thwy roasted?

[Kristin Lee]

It's a total hippie fair in the back woods of Eugene...some people can be found in leather loin cloths and not much else. There is a public shower/sauna. Open bon fires, drum towers, all natural foods - nothing that isn't home made is allowed past the main gates. So yeah...pretty darn close :)

[Mark]

Damn I wanna go!

[Baby Ricochet]

Some great imagery here Mark. An exceptional write for sure.

[SyberRose]

and when our moon is fading
and the sun, again, comes back
We sleep in the tree's shading
and our souls no longer lack.


Only a poet can visiulize a nude women in flames...
and I love that painting...Loved the poem too...nicely done Mark...Would make a great song.

[Leslie Philibert]

nice song-like poem with solid and lyrical stanzas, a good write this...

[Nia Hope]

Very intriguing I like this a lot

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

It's a fantastic piece that relates well adn a joy to read, well done.

[Coyote Poetry]

Music is my motivator. Old songs take me back to good days. I enjoy the good ride in the poem. Good to celebrate the day. Tomorrow may come. At least we raised hell once. No weakness in the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[icelandicblue]

I love the rhyme and the whole primal dance of the piece. You've got great imagery here that beckons for more than one read. I enjoyed this poem very much and found it somewhat mesmerizing.

[Jack...]

Hey Buddy, Pick a lane and stay in it. I often hear myself yelling this at someone who could care less what I have to say. Very cool my friend. Oh, I also yell a few other things, but I won't go into that now. Indeed, nature, a slower pace, speed limits we can keep up with easily.

[Mark]

hey now, I can actually think and drive heehee. I know what you mean though. I drive 2-3000 miles a week and say plenty of things I'd not share with the general public!

[Angi]

Excellent, excellent! This flows well, I read aloud and I found myself chanting which is perfect for the content. I love the idea of shedding all this crap and going back to nature, fire, water, meat!, no clothes, no phones, nothing but the stars ands the basics. Nicely done, Mark! PS: Love the Cult, btw Angi~