Halved

just another break up poem...

I can't say when the clouds came down

I only remember their sting;

wet and clinging.

I only know when you left me wanting

the feeling was alone in it's pure

monotone of ache.

I don't remember the rushed stars

winking from above,

pushing clouds at me.

I remember the longing

bones hurt and splintered

memories made dusty song.

I remember the flying,

where you and I

merged into end and beginning.

To slice apart what was

so long fused;

blood wasn't enough,

Death wasn't the worst,

Life wasn't the cost,

My soul, torn, puddled at your feet.

Reviews

[QuietlyCrash]

That's painful. I could just feel the heartache in this piece. Beautiful job :)

[redflutterby]

So powerful and heartbreaking....it brought tears to my eyes. :-(

[Nia Hope]

Always love your imagery keep it up :)

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

A telling and highly emotional piece to read, one must take their time reaing this piece.

[Mark]

Thank you Thomas. Always glad for thoughts.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

this reminds me of when i lost my best friend, Paula...

i still feel her...although she has been dead so many years..."the monotone of ache"

but i also see this as losing a family member...the "blood not enough"

i don't remember when the cloud burst...our memories hazy because of the rain of pain.

this write hits in the gut.

jacob

[Mark]

Thank you Jacob. I'm pleased it moved you my friend

[Frieda P]

Felt this one Mark, the ones that tug at my heart and hit me in the gut while flipping me over are the ones I always recall reading, I'll remember this read.

[Mark]

Wow, thanks hon. Glad it moved you!

[Frieda P]

Was my pleasure my friend.

[Chris]

There are at a minimum - three categories of poetry: Real, Memorex, and life-shaded experience. Some will add fantasy, some perhaps horror - others perhaps something of their own determination.
All place a bar to be overcome - to reach being felt inside by a reader/listener. My life-experience puts this one above that bar.

[Mark]

Thank you for the high praise sir. Glad it reached you. :)

[quinfinn]

this is so cleverly worded and speaks to me on a level i truly understand. a beautiful write, indeed.

[Mark]

Thanks for reading!