Chaos Rain

another Halloween fright

It started one night

when a full moon deigned

to erupt  pale light

and begin the chaos reign.

Men were taken by the score

women left behind to scream

their return through hell's door

brought back the evil's dream.

some who died did not decay

but ruled behind the laugh.

those that lived fell that day

shivering in the sun's draft.

Hell's gates opened wide

and spilled the insane

dead alive on the tide

a lovely chaos rain.

Hope turned inside

to burn our hearts

while we all cried

at the demons' arts.

alive is now dead

and the dead now rule.

hunger is our bread

thirst only a fool.

Laugh when they cry

replace love with pain

wishing to die

to be the chaos rain.

Demons tear us apart

to make us whole again

In the darkness we start

to feel the chaos rain.

In once lovers, now dead

we sense what was light

now hate we are fed

goodness our blight.

Author's Note

picture taken from http://english.haqobatil.com

Reviews

[Sid]

Amazing write...had a dark unsettling quality to it with a great flow.
Demons tear us apart
to make us whole again
In the darkness we start
to feel the chaos rain.
This is my favorite stanza. It almost feels like a fight with the demons that dwell inside all of us, startling and really unsettling imagery. I don't yet know what your other poems dwell on but this gave me chills. A perfectly dark poem with amazing imagery and a great flow. I love it!!

[Mark]

Thank you so much for reading and commenting. :)

[Coyote Poetry]

A Dante's type tale my friend. When kindness and hope is weakness. Man had reach a bad place. No kindness in the poem. A roller coaster ride into a hell. No weakness in the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[John Phoenix Hutchinson..]

Congratulations this poem has been "approved" for publication in...

THE MAGICAL MYTHICAL MYSTERY COMPENDIUM.

-Fantasy and Factual Poems of the Arcane.

By John Phoenix Hutchinson and Others. (c) 2012

Please feel free to submit other poems as you are not limited to one entry. Also please write a short "bio" about yourself and send to me via private message. This will be published along with your poem. Thanks J.P.H.

[Mark]

:)

[Claire Twinn]

You have created a dark, wretched feeling- well done!!

[Mark]

Thank you CLaire! I think LOL

[Robbie~xoxo~]

Yikes!...this one is eerie Mark...no happy ending? lol

When you write frightening pieces it really creates chills!

"Men were taken by the score

women left behind to scream

their return through hell's door

brought back the evil's dream.




some who died did not decay

but ruled behind the laugh.

those that lived fell that day

shivering in the sun's draft"~ Great flow... loved the climactic build of this write!

[Mark]

Thanks hon! :) I didn't want a happy ending on this one, wanted it to be chaotic ;)

[Robbie~xoxo~]

oh no, you don't want a happy ending... LOL...It's Perfect... it did have a dramatic ending that leaves a frightening image in my mind. Thanks Mark! lol

[Blue Ivory]

Fascinating and freaky! Yes halloween is everywhere at the moment. It's so tempting to write something about it! I do wish you used some other font to add effect, but I suppose you find it immature? :P Anyway, I really like the chilling effect this poem has and I love the image.

[Mark]

LOL I'm not so stuck up as to think that Siren really. I just am not good at picking fonts so I stick to the default.

[Blue Ivory]

Haha I didn't mean you're stuck up :P I just figured you probably think it's a little childish...You could try Poor Richard if you're thinking about it. But that's your decision entirely :)

[Mark]

okay hon, as long as it's readable I'll use it thanks! :)

[Stanley Wilson]

great poem dark intense very well written

[Mark]

thanks :)

[mandy]

very dark...topsy turvy, alive is now dead, and the dead rule....i liked the rhyming, very good job.

[Mark]

Thanks hon :)

[lee von cleef]

A departure is a beginning, Mark your words here have a new coat ,be careful of the way words knock down dominoes ,some can't stand them back up, what was outside their thoughts is now inside, the weighted wheels fly out of balance.Can Grace stand them up right.

[Mark]

A good description of chaos my friend. :)

[Ruth]

You carry a great message love...
This carries with goosebumps but it is wise too :)
xox

[Mark]

Thanks hon. I had hoped to convey a sense of upside down, inside out-ness.

[Ruth]

And you did :) Most welcome xox

[Pratik]

This is dark and demented... But I can see through the metaphors that actually talk about the modern times.... The rhyming scheme is brilliantly done.. The ABAB rhyming is something I have always found difficult to achieve yet i see you doing it so effortlessly... This is superb! Well done Mark :)

[Mark]

wow, thanks Aaran :)

[Pratik]

You are welcome Mark :)