Just Killing a Tree

my life is like the wind
unpredictable and spontaneous.
it blasts my tears, like rain,
and bits of my soul, like debris,
crashing into my forehead:
splat, splat!
god's funny little way
of showing me
my failures.

as if his hand swept down in an instant
knocked me over,
stole my things,
packed all my relationships in a bag
and shook it.

as if his enemy weren't satan, afterall,
it was me.

as if this universe,
this galaxy,
this solar system,
this planet,
this country,
state,
city,
street,
house,
all these relationships,
all these things
were made simply as tools
to ruin everything.

and it all makes me so unsure,
not only of who i am,
but where i stand
and why i am.
people seldom ask those questions,
though they're equally important.
interview yourself,
you'll learn a lot.

8/20/08