Whiskey Eyes

Not sure where I am supposed to start,
Guess that may be the hardest part.
See New Years Eve opened up my eyes,
Focusing on you as my sobriety dies.
I know I was there as just your friend,
Hide the messages I wanted to send.
Looking across the fire, feel as fear dies,
Can see only your smile with whiskey eyes.
I watch you from across this flame burning,
Can feel it as my emotions start churning.
You nothing like any one that came before,
I feel there is a lot more ahead in store.
Normally I keep a guard up for a long time,
How fast you got in should be a crime.
Like how did you fall asleep in my arms,
All without setting off any of my alarms.
Realizing that as the morning drew near,
I would have to let go of you my dear.
Knew as the sun rose I needed to leave,
Even if it’s not what I wanted to believe.
Now I lay here alone and my mind ponders,
Thinking of everything there is, it wonders.
How can two people connect on this level,
Her a beer angel and me a whiskey devil.
Both broken, lost, feeling the worlds crush,
Enjoying the other, and feeling life’s rush.
Like today where we don’t talk, it’s hard,
Not your fault, I’m just deeply scarred.
Anxiety and self loathing come out to play,
No matter what I say to myself day to day.
The words are down and here are my cries,
Saying this, not through my whiskey eyes.