Utter Strife

She left destroying all I knew,
Leaving me without a clue.
Trying to learn how to live right,
Loosing the heart I had to write.
Living my days in total fear,
My life being controlled by beer.
No time a day was I ever sober,
Trying to kill the memory of her.
Spending every night trying to not cry,
Waiting on the day I would finally die.
Then one morning when I woke,
I felt my sobrieties slight poke.
I knew I had to move on in life,
Knowing my life was in utter strife.
So I acted like I was moving on,
But it was all a lie, full blown.
Acting like I had felt a change,
That happiness was in range.
Fake being happy all I'd do,
Fake that is, till I met you.