Exile

Exile

A Poem by A.J.

Exile      

 

Outside, it’s as cloudy as it is in here on a regular basis,

The rain trickling down through my breath on the window-

across the bars symbolic of my self-imposed cell.

 

It pours from the bed of the creek downhill into the unknown

Though even if it were the waters of john, it would never be enough to save my soul-

 

So I remain here within my confines, away from the world,

Though if you were to ask, I am by most accounts- free to go.

 

There is nothing out there for me, at least not within my grasp;

I am forsaken, forgotten, alone in this so-called “home” by everything that I love, searching for a change in this tune.

 

I find myself checking the phone, hopeful and dreaming as usual,

Though Ive known for some time now, not to expect that call;

A symptom of longing long cursed into emptiness-

But the battery’s charged and ready to go- that’s a plus.

 

To penance, I am four years a slave, and amends have been finally made- though the price, I still pay.

The chains are rusting, but not quite ready to break.

© 2014 A.J.


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Featured Review

You can't hold a fire in your ribcage with burning, so I think a lot of artists will sympathize with you when you speak of the creative fire that burns from within. I sure do! I enjoyed your poem and encourage you to write more in order to refine your craft. You have the talent; now it's time to really practice hard in preparation for mastery.

Happy Holidays and New Year 2015!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A.J.

10 Years Ago

thank you very much for your critique. I have recently been slacking in my writing. I suppose I need.. read more
Ghost of Jupiter

10 Years Ago

I will make sure to stop by and read your new posts. :) keep writing!



Reviews

Almost feels like self exile, afraid to face the world and therefore building a wall and living as a hermit.
Alone, forgotten, but safe.

Posted 9 Years Ago


Floetic

9 Years Ago

Look at that! I nailed one. :)
I enjoyed the poem.
A.J.

9 Years Ago

thank you for reading. I'll be going over yours soon.
Floetic

9 Years Ago

You're welcome. That'd be great.
I can relate to this, especially during the peak of my decent into the darkness.
Isolation can either make you, or break you entirely.
A very honest, moving piece.

As a sidenote, having grown up on Seinfeld, a certain line in this brought me a little bit of nostalgic joy,
I'll share it with you via picture.
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/91/b9/30/91b930cfef725f091d691d874ad5a048.jpg

-VM



Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A.J.

10 Years Ago

thank you for reading! and hahahaha! that's awesome!
A.J.

10 Years Ago

absolutely perfect actually. right up to my hair today.
"A symptom of longing long cursed into emptiness-

But the battery’s charged and ready to go- that’s a plus.



To penance, I am four years a slave"

Simple, short but so powerful. We all try to free ourselves from slavery and fill it from emptiness. Excellent, sir...:)........

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A.J.

10 Years Ago

thank you for reading once again, I always enjoy your critiques.
Sami Khalil

10 Years Ago

My pleasure. Any time...:)................................
Wow, such depth of emptiness in this piece ... The heartfelt ache is palpable. You penned this amazingly well.

Posted 10 Years Ago


A.J.

10 Years Ago

thank you very much for reading. much of my poetry is relatively similar in this fashion. although t.. read more
You can't hold a fire in your ribcage with burning, so I think a lot of artists will sympathize with you when you speak of the creative fire that burns from within. I sure do! I enjoyed your poem and encourage you to write more in order to refine your craft. You have the talent; now it's time to really practice hard in preparation for mastery.

Happy Holidays and New Year 2015!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A.J.

10 Years Ago

thank you very much for your critique. I have recently been slacking in my writing. I suppose I need.. read more
Ghost of Jupiter

10 Years Ago

I will make sure to stop by and read your new posts. :) keep writing!

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Added on December 21, 2014
Last Updated on December 21, 2014

Author

A.J.
A.J.

Ft. Gibson, OK



About
My pen name is AJ. As far as writing, I enjoy finding the beauty, the tragedy, the strength and the reality of everything, right down to smallest, seemingly most insignificant details. The world as I .. more..

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