Vulnerability

A Story by Person

Just a little short story. One of my many to come.

I burn everything, everything that we have, down because I can’t do the one thing that seems so easy for everyone else to do. I can do the hardest of trainings or the toughest of works, but when it comes to this, I can’t compete. You need someone whole. That someone isn’t me. I come with hard times and emotional upheavals. I throw them at you, knowing I shouldn’t. You say “It’s ok”, but I know better. It’s not. It never has been nor will it ever be. I know I shouldn’t dump my own personal wallows on you, but you seem willing to take them and I just want to be rid of them. You’re an opportunity, lying in wait. You say you will help me back up on my feet. But can you? Isn’t this my battle to fight? Will he even let me have some relief? I don’t know. I don’t know anything anymore. All I know is that I love you and that you are all I need to keep myself fighting right now. But I can’t push you far enough away to make you want to leave. The harder I push, the stronger you pull to get me back to you. I’m weak and defenseless. I’m vulnerable and tentative. And yet, you won’t take advantage of me. Why? Why won’t you do what others have done before you? I’m so close to being finished, but yet you won’t finish me. Instead of doing that, you feel the need to protect me and comfort and assure and love me. Why? Those three little words you say to me have so much meaning, but I can’t bring myself to break my habit and do what others would. What makes you want to do that?