Strength

Smoking cigarettes outside of hotel rooms never felt so normal to me. Running out of options just seemed way to familiar. Opening my eyes was something I wasn't capable of doing. Id count down the hours, waiting for it to be time for me to slip away into a deep sleep. Sleep was the only way I could truly run away and be completely free of every casualty. Casualties of my realistic dreams that always seemed impossible. Laughter was so foreign to me. I couldn't feel didn't feel the need to. Times were tough always have been. The only thing that I have been able to laugh at is the fact that I'm still here living my everyday life. That's strength. Strength I never knew I had. My strength sure as hell didn't show when others were taunting me. Strength showed its face two weeks later when it was over and forgotten. Still standing and ready for the next obstacle in this incredibly beautiful deceiving life.