What lies beneath

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The night was humid and windy. The branches danced as the wind moved at a steady beat. I sat in our living room, greasy bag of popcorn and a fizzy soda by my side. I never really liked our new house, it had such a strong, heavy vibe to it. We moved in it about 2 weeks ago because my dad was offered a new job. They were at a banquet promoting a new program and I was stuck here for the night.
Some old horror movie was on and it was the least of my worries. It was so predictable. Glazing out the window, I noticed the dark shadows started to engulf our house. Suddenly the house went dark. I froze in my spot and suddenly became aware of every limb movement.
“What an old dumb house.” I said to myself trying to shake the fear. I started to walk toward the basement door when a sharp squeak pierced the air. “Who’s there?” I screamed out. My heart thudded as I looked around the room. I grasped the brush that was on the side table and held it as a weapon. Fear was overwhelming me and I was breaking into a cold sweat. As soon as I began to walk a swift shadow past and a lamp fell to the floor.
“Oh no, oh no.” I cried to myself as I began bagging up. My back thudded as it hit the wall. “I gotta get out of here.” I peered around trying to find a quick get away. My eyes began to water as I realized what was actually going on. I saw the back door and decided to take a run for it. I looked around and then sprinted for the door. But before I could make it a cold-hard hand grabbed my armed began suffocating me with a foul smelling rag. In a matter of seconds, my eyes grew heavy. I tried hard to fight it off but no use came as I fell into a deep sleep.
I woke up in a dark room with a painful headache. My legs felt weak and numb. “Mom, Dad.” I moaned. I dark figure appeared and stood over me. “Hush child.” It said in a rusty, deep voice as it stroked my hair. I flinched in horror. “Please just let me go. I’ll give you anything. Just please let me go home. I tried moving my hands but they were tied together. He walked around until he was behind me. His cold hands touched my neck. “No. Please. No!” I screamed. But I know they couldn’t be heard. I knew my time was coming to an end but what happened to me is for you to decide.

Fear is Terror itself.
Only The strong can beat it.
But the true secrets lie beneath and shall soon be told.

Reviews

[El Suplexo]

Ahh, the Lady or the Tiger. To be honest, I've always felt like the whole "leave the ending for the reader to decide" deal is nothing more then a plot device, and a kinnda lazy one at that. The story itself is not too bad. I think that there are some pacing issues, that you need to slow it down to draw the tension out. 3 or 4 big chunks of writing are not good at inspiring terror. And the ending . . . In the other story I read, "Dying to Live Another Day", the ending was pretty good. This one . . . not so much. That fact that it is written in first person makes it all the more dissapointing, because it feels like not only did the author decide not to write a real ending, but the character almost maliciously decides not to tell us. I mean, the person this is happening to will obviously know what happened, so why would they not tell us? What is the point of not telling?

[Vampire Wombat]

Nice job. I kind of don't like the last sentence. It seems to be kind of blunt in telling the reader to imagine what happened. Keep up the good work.