Killer

When you love someone, and they leave you.

Forensic evidence says you did not,
But in lamond terms you left me to rot,
you stabbed my heart and my soul bled,
and I was left in a pool of red.

You are innocent to every one but me,
they should lock you up, you should not be free!
If I was alive I would burn the key,
and pushish you for killing me!

But unable to move, my body is still,
you were my medicine, heroin, pill.
You snatched me up and said that thing,
And when you said it I began to sing,

You said you loved me, you needed my soul,
You theif, you murdered you hurt and you stole!
You took my life when you left me here!
And now I'm dead, and I do not fear.

So I will return, dont you worry,
I will watch you run, run hide and scurry,
you cannot hide, you cannot run,
and I'll be having so much fun!

I'll open a bottle, a bottle of jack,
My eyes will be open but I will see black,
That's what you caused, that's what you done,
And then, guess what? I'll open the rum.

Make you legless so there's nowhere to cry,
any last words before you die?
I'll open the window and feel the breeze,
And watch you say sorry as you hit your knees,

I'll watch you beg, and ask to live,
I've lost myself, I can't forgive,
you did this! you murdered me!
Now I'm gonna watch YOU bleed!

don't say sorry, you're dying too.
I'll take you with me, I'll choke you blue,
Until i see the genuine regret in your eyes,
And I'll make sure that the vodka's not dry.

Reviews

[MoriartyMesa]

While reading this one line stuck out in my head "I'll watch you, ask to live", than brought me too thinking of Red Doors Painted Black.


And it made me think, this not only makes me feel The Rolling Stones, but brought me to the first emotions of Paint it Black.

Mick might want to call you, cause I swear I felt the Stones reading this.

[Mi Wae]

two vicitims here of murder then breakup then the fight back of murdering and/ or redemption ... nice and dark and interesting point of view.. the inclusion of strong alcohol as an image bring an intoxicating power to the prose... nice job :)

[mark slade]

Powerful imagery. Great poetry.

[phiemdu]

Oh my, every line flows so beautifully that I think this whole poem can be sung like a song. Powerful!

[Invisible_Ninja]

Oh wow this is so good, I love the rhythm and rhyme it works so naturally and unforced and just really gets across the emotion brilliantly, keep writing :)

[Distant horizons]

This is genius. full stop. i'm gonna stop talking now because that's all that needs saying, except for the big long explanation i'm giving for why i don't need to say any more than what i've already said, which, if you look back on, is quite a lot for someone who said full stop after word two. Yes, i know. i will shut up soon, promise. (nurse, he's out of bed again) :)
love this manymegamuchly.