Tankas of a Broken Soul (Dreams)

I will live in dreams,
Forever drifting away
Waiting for a cloud
To carry my soul away
Where I am wanted and loved.

Emptiness abound,
My heart is left hollow-shelled,
Barren withouht peace,
A desert waiting for rain
To quench my eternal thirst.

My longing can't end.
I long to find connection
In a lonely world.
Darkness is the only home
I have ever known or will.

Dreams are the one way
I can live in happiness
And find Nirvana;
A blue skied land of promise,
An eden where I prosper.

I will live in dreams,
Searching to find the true path
To a better life
Where the morrow is not dark
And promises my heart..hope..

Author's Note

a tanka is a five line japanese poem consisting of this syllable structure (5,7,5,7,7) I put a bunch of tankas together in this little collection

Reviews

[GridLok]

My apologies for taking so long to respond.

While you consistently display a flair for the dramatic and an able sense of composition, I would urge you to be more adventurous in exploration of scenarios that might allow the application of your abilities to the expression of concern for others. Besides, "Darkness is the only home/I have ever known or will" is not only maudlin, but is directly contradicted by the last verse.

Dear IceDragonOfPluto, I hope I have not offended - that is not my intention. My hope is that my remarks may, in some small way, promote an extension of your obvious ability.

[Fragilebrokendreams]

Oh it is truly beautiful indeed. To find a land of your own a garden of eden, is like finding a sanctuary. I felt this one cut me deep inside. Well done.

[Fairytale]

Beautiful. The first paragraph was like a dream. Light and soothing.