First Kiss

I smiled,

You smiled back.

I nodded,

You brush my arm with your hand.

I shiver under the touch,

You smiled again and leaned forward.

I closed my eyes,

You lips brushed mine.

Slowly you pulled away,

Leaving me electrified.

I smiled at that feeling,

Instantly wanting more.

So I pulled you closer,

Deepening the kiss.

It was my first time ever

To have something like this.

Author's Note

What do you think?"

Reviews

[Kayliee]

This is so cute!! I'm probably going to end up forever alone, so I may not experience such a thing... XD.
Though your words were simple, the poem was kept at a high value. For one, simple words makes the text easier for the readers to understand. And second, the words you chose planted a vivid image in my mind--which I'm working on doing in my writing--, which I really enjoyed! :)
I look foward to reading more of your work!!

[Starcaller]

I think it is very sweet :3

[Gurdeep...The Lost]

Reallly nice , the way u expresses the whole 'kiss' was so gud....everyone wud desire a first one like this ..lol

[Emily]

Aw, short but sweet. I think they rhyme scheme helped to make the poem sweeter and more magical. It captures the emotion, too.

[AK]

Omg, it is brilliant! I think it is wonderful! The flow was brilliant, the expression of emotions stunning. Keep writing!

[Secret Lullaby]

awww this is so cute :) I have a poem called "my first kiss" and its about me getting my first kiss too...i really like yours though :)

[Michael G.]

This is a very pretty poem. It flows beautifully and kept me interested all the way to the end. It reminded me of my first kiss. You never forget it!

Don't sell yourself short. It was good. I never tell anyone what I think about my work, before they read it. I let them decide on their own. Otherwise, you may just get a sympathy review, or a kind pat on the shoulder.

[Summer'sBreeze]

Are you kidding? This isn't bad, it really captures the moment.
A wonderful write!

And thanks for the review!