Chapter 1

When was the last time you sighed contentedly and said 'Ah! This is how life should be'? When was the last time you proudly said 'Its good to wear your heart on your sleeve'?

Philosophy of my life: If you stop feeling, you stop living.

Every person, in every moment of his/her life, feels one thing or another. There is Pleasant Feelings and there is Unpleasant Feelings. The Pleasant Feelings would be Love, Joy, Surprise, Warmth. And the Unpleasant Feelings would be Anger, Fear, Disappointment, Hurt or... Indifference.



Yes! Indifference is a feeling too. 

Like I said, every person has one feeling or another. And Indifference is he just chooses not to acknowledge it. 

This is how things revolve around me. This is how things should revolve around everyone. 

But the truth is...

I. Feel. Nothing.

No happiness.

No sadness.

No pain.

I'm 28. I have a wonderful job that satisfies all the basic needs. 

But my needs are different. 

I want to feel alive. I want someone who can bring that out of me. I want to love. I want to be loved. I want lust. I want to feel excited. I want to feel that shiver that runs through your spine, that is described in so so many contemporary romance books I read. 

"Hey! Back to earth!", Joanna snapped her fingers in front of my face. Apparently, I was lost in my thoughts... Again! This has been happening a lot to me lately. 



"What? I'm still here", I retorted. 

"Oh yeah? Tell me what was the last thing I said", Joanna raised her eyebrows challenging me. Looking at me curiously. I can almost see the pity in her eyes. 

"Ugh! You win. But I'm pretty sure it must be something about how good John was in bed last night", I sounded ruder than I meant it, I regretted it. I dropped my eyes feeling ashamed of myself. 

"Sweetie, I know you, like the back of my hand. Tell me what's wrong. And don't beat yourself for what you said. I know you didn't mean it. And I also know you're probably regretting it right now" she stated knowingly. Of course she does. Who am I kidding?! Joanna has been the only confidant in my life.

"I'm sorry Jo, I love you," I said sheepishly. 

She grinned and gave me a hug. 

"I love you too. Now please, stop brooding like this. It doesn't suit you. And tell me what are your plans for this evening?"

"Well... I'm thinking of joining that volunteer thing which Nate told me about last week" I said. Nate was my colleague at Neosoft, a software company where I work as a Software Engineer. 

"Oh you do? That's awesome!" She smiled. I could see she was happy with my decision. "You should keep yourself busy. I would rather suggest dating than volunteering at a hospital" she shrugged. 

"You want me to date just so to keep myself busy??" I smirked. Sometimes, the worst advice given to you is by your Best Friend! 

"What's wrong with that? At least you won't be going to bed with your BOB", she winked and burst out laughing.

"Jo! Stop talking about BOB in public places" I groaned. Sometimes, the most annoying person you will ever meet will be your... Yes! Your Best Friend! 

"Oh psht! Like I didn't go through that phase before John", she smirked.

"For the nth time, I don't want to know about the things you do, which are not done in public places, got it?", I said with mock anger. I knew nothing would stop her from telling me about her sexcapades! 

"That reminds me, I had sex with John in a park once" she said nonchalantly, like it was the most common thing people would do. 

"Ohh goddddd", I whined getting up from my seat. "I'll pretend that you never said that to me. I'm leaving. I need to get as far away from you as possible", I growled making her laugh so hard that she almost choked.



After an hour I was driving to the hospital. My thoughts wandered back to what Jo had said. In the park? Really?? I knew she wasn't kidding. She and John could never keep their hands off of each other. I could never understand that feeling. They had been married for almost two years now but they still acted like newlyweds. I sighed. I had given up any hope I had regarding that matter after my last boyfriend 3 years ago. He said and I quote "You're too nerdy" unquote. I'm pretty sure that qualifies as The Stupidest reason for a breakup. I wasn't sorry about it, anyway. I felt nothing for that guy. Or any guy for that matter. 

I parked my car and walked towards the hospital. 

Victoria Hospital.

Highly understaffed- reason for which they called for a volunteer service. 

And the reason for which I was standing here. 

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A/N: I have just started it... I thought I'll finish first 10 chapters first and then publish. But I couldn't resist:-):-) I have 6 chapters so far. 

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Criticism gladly welcomed^_^
Thank you


-Pri, A Mystery Lover