How Could They

Just another poem on how I feel I guess.

How could they say they care and understand when they don't even notice that the smile on my face is just a cover up for my fucked up mind. When my mind is racing with thoughts that no person should have to think about. When my wrists are crying tears of red at 2 am.
How could they say they love me when I have to spoon feed them help and encouragement and all I get is "I'm sorry" or sometimes a hug and I'm all fake smiles and mournful laughter to keep them from seeing how hurt I am.
How could they say they feel my pain when they never lost as much as I have lost or cried as much as I have cried.
How could they say they are here for me when it's 2 f*****g am and I sent you a text an hour before asking you to save me!
But then again
How could I make a promise to not end my precious life when my wrists have been ripped open and a crooked smile has formed on my face while I take my final breath.

Author's Note

Sorry if this is triggering. I've been going through a lot and writing this stuff kinda helps me clear my head I guess. This is to anyone who is going through hell and has lost their way or to anyone who has known people who has done this to them.