He is Not Me

A self portrayal of life after loss.

The last several years have been a haze.

Tword my mirror I dare not gaze.

I fear the man that looks back at me.

Will not be the one I remember to be.

That man has gone, but he left me.

To live his pain of loss you see.

I am here, but yet I may not be.

The man he was, before he left me.

His daughters died so tragically.

So he could not stay without them, or me.

He left this world his life was gone.

I wish I didn't have to carry on.

His pain I bear for him, not me.

As I am not the man I use to be.

My life was good, I never complained.

Here in his world it always rains.

Trapped inside I will remain.

Till he comes back, with less pain.

I pray its soon he makes his way.

His life I lead, I may not last the day.

Heartbreak stays, but not love you see.

Pain confusion heartbreak seclusion.

Are the only emotions left for me.

Thoughts come slow lost I be.

All I was has gone from me.

Left with an empty shell no good inside.

The pain is almost impossible to hide.

He lost all the day God brought his girls to stay.

Five years now almost to the day.

No good has returned in me to stay.

I fear my life will go astray.

This pain grows stronger by the day.

Will I come back from this pain?

Or will I lose what little I have left?

This enormous hurt will be my death.

If your paths ever cross one day.

Please send him back this way.

He is not me!!!!

He is not me!!!!