Silent, Why, God?

I haven't talked;
My voice isn't really my own again.
It's low like Autumn breezes,
And colder inside.
I don't ask for help,
Though we know I need it.
I can't do this on my own...
"God speed, my friend,"
Is just something old timers say.
"I'm going to meet my Father,"
Is not really true, all the time,
But I want to meet you again
And throw my arms around you;
Bury you in kisses that I didn't do before.
"God, give me strength,"
I would pray. Now I'm guilty.
And you're not home.
I don't talk anymore.