Small story

Small story about a teenage girl going through depression...

I wanted to die. There was nothing that I would have actually done in this life. Why couldn't I be different? Why did I have to be stuck in this ugly body? Why is everyone like this to me? What have I done wrong to deserve this? Do I really look like they say I look? Is there no one who finds me pretty? How do I look to other people? Why do I have to be the ugly one? Why does it have to be me? Why can’t I be pretty just like everyone else? Why do even adults who are suppose to teach me the right way how to treat people, treat me like I have no feelings? Why? I have feelings like everyone else. I can be happy, sad, angry, and depressed just like everyone else. I’m trying my best to fit in, to be liked, to have friends, to be pretty… using all that expensive make-up, trying out different hair styles, trying out creams, lotions, perfume and all that other stuff which is supposed to make me ‘pretty’. But what is it like to be pretty? What is it like to have Real friends, who don't make fun of each other, who don't Photoshop old pictures of you and send them to everyone, who don't compare you to animals, who don't care if you wear that lotion, if you like that singer, or if you find that person pretty. Who just don't judge you of your appearance from the outside?  But I guess friends like that just don't exist in this new and modern and also apparently fair society. Thinking, that it is good to have Facebook, where you can show the pictures of your ugly friends. Where sharing everything is just one ‘click’ away, and then showing those pictures, letting other people making screenshots of them. And even if you try to delete it… it will never get away. It will always be on other people’s phones, living there, waiting until it can get shared again. My life was just a failure. My friends who make fun of me, but I just cant let go of them otherwise… ill be alone. Alone is just as bad as being dead… I thought. Over time, I figured out, that being alone isn’t bad… the bad thing is, is to feel alone.

Author's Note

Its my first time trying to write a story like that. Its not really good so don't expect too much :)
If you have any advice I would really appreciate it