The End of the Road

Listen to your gut.

That morning was just like every other day. I woke up, got my clothes ready, took a shower, and fixed some breakfast. However something was different about that day. I had this cold chill on the back of my neck; I thought maybe it was my air condition unit. I shrug it off ,ate my breakfast, and went on my commute to work.

I was lucky not to live to far away from work; I could easily walk there and get my workout in. Along the way to work ,I felt that same chill on the back of my neck. I ignored it, and thought it was the breeze off a passing car. The closer I got to work the more frequent the chill happened. Then I realized what it reminded me of ,like someone breathing on your neck. I got to the cross walk , and the walking light said go now. I felt the chill one more time, and looked behind me. There was something tall, wearing a long black robe, and carrying a scythe right behind me. His hand passed right through me, and I felt so cold. The next thing I knew, I see a car ,and it hit me dead on. I saw my body lying on the ground and blood everywhere.

The cloaked figure raised the scythe, and cut the air with it. You could see a black line in mid air were it had cut the air. It grabbed the line, and open it up to reveal a pitch black void. It grabbed me ,and through me in. I was falling for so long ; I stopped screaming in terror along time ago. I eventually fell on something solid. Whatever this place is it is devoid of both color and light. I eventually heard a voice in the darkness. It was a man that I have not ever met before. We started talking about what had happened to us. He said that he remembered being chased by someone with a gun, and then he saw the exact same thing that I did. The thing wearing the long black robe. I asked him how long have you been here? He couldn't say. He said," you lose track of time in what I call the pit." We started talking about what had happened before we encountered the thing. The usual boring details, and right before we saw it we were about to die or so it appears. Then it became clear, and that was Death itself. Then that also mean, we are truly gone.

Then out of dark void two passageways opened out of thin air. One that appears to go up, and one that it looks like it goes down. The man pushed me ,and started running to the passageway going up.

I yelled, "don't go that way." He said," sayonara kid."

I didn't know why I yelled don't go that way. I had this feeling in my gut to avoid that route. Since I didn't like the route he took; there was only one other way to go. I started walking down the second passageway. It was odd feeling walking down, the ground was nothing like the ground or stairs in the world of the living. This place is still devoid of both color or light ;no matter how far I walk. I could still hear that guy walking upwards, even though we went two different ways.

Then suddenly there was this door that appeared out of thin air. Then I heard the man screaming at me saying, I found the exit better luck next time. He saw a opening in the floor with lighting coming from it; he jumped in head first. I heard him screaming, but then the way he screamed changed. I was afraid to see what's was behind the door. I opened it, and behind it was the most beautiful sight I have ever lay my eyes upon. Someone was there to greet me , and to answer my questions. I did died to a car hitting me, but that wasn't caused by Death.

He said ,"that was going to happen today no matter what you did. It is the job of those cloaked figures or Grim Reaper as you call them ; to peacefully push their target soul out of their body before they die. So they feel little to no pain at all".

" What about that scythe, and that place?"

"That place is called the judgement grounds where two soul are judged where they're going to spend the rest of their life. The scythe is the only way to open the doorway into that realm. You see one will always go to hell, purgatory, or etc, and one will come here. Once you both realized that you are both have died and accept that, that's when the passageways will open. Tell me why didn't you go follow that man? Surely it's better to remain together in a strange place then separated?"

"I had this feeling that I shouldn't go there, and I even yelled don't go to him. However he wouldn't listen".

" You see he also had a feeling that it was the right passage for him. He assumed that, that place follows the same rules as the living world. Up means up, and down means down. He fell into the pit where he shall remain for a long time. You see during his life he killed many innocent people, and left that world with to many dark, heavy sins on his soul. However your soul was light and bright that's why you are here now. I wish that you find true peace here." Then he walked away.

"I spent a long time going over what had happened to me and my life. To be honest ,it was a good time to die. My parents were already died so they didn't need to bury their son. I had no girlfriend, boyfriend, or pet in my life. I have a strong brother to look after my burial. He has a beautiful wife and three wonderful children . The family name will live on, and they will easily find my replacement at my work place. I am at peace with my death, and so you should be too. Welcome to this marvelous place . Call it whatever you want. I hope you find peace in this place new arrival. "

Author's Note

I'm still new to writing; so any advice is welcomed. I hope you liked it.

Reviews

[Inject Positivity]

I call that place "loving soul's house"...

Wow!! You have quite strongly presented the theme you chose... The story telling was really good, always something happening... I really liked the detailed way of narrating, and also used dialogues to create more attraction to the piece...

I have a suggestion, separate the dialogues from the lines, I think it will help the reader to find more catchy feel in the story... In the sixth para did you mean "I did died due to a car hitting me"?.. .

Very well done Dylan...

Sincerely
Dhiman

[Howling_Wolf]

Good Evening Dhiman, and thank you for your wonderful review. I'm glad you liked my little story, even if it one of my somewhat darker tale's. I took your advice, and it does look a little better, thank you. I had to read that half a dozen times to final catch it; I need to get better at proofreading.

Sincerely
Dylan

[Craig2591]

You changed tense several times during the story. Otherwise, it is a good story. You made death into a pleasant experience.

[Shannon]

There are so many messages here. But I think I hear "follow your own path'the latest.

[Splatman73]

I felt this had more that could be done with it, but what was done was done well. There is a little formatting and grammar that could use some work but overall great job.