A W A k E...

After a drunken night on the town, Jane wakes to find some unwelcome messages on her mobile phone...

     Jane Grey rolled her eyes and blinked into the gloom. Her head was pounding and her mouth was dry. She tasted sweat on her upper lip and smelled stale alcohol on her breathe. She massaged the bridge of her nose and creased her brow as another wave of nausea rolled over her. A dim light played across her fingertips as she located her mobile phone tucked into the shirt pocket at her breast.
     �Jesus�� she whispered, as faint recollections from the night before filtered back into her mind. Wine, cocktails, tequila.
     The display from the phone hurt her eyes as she held it close to her nose; evidently she had slept in her contacts again as her eyes felt gritty and sore.
     12 unread messages.
     Jane gave a slight shake of her head, irritated that she had again drunk beyond her capacity, as her thumb worked over the keys.
     Message 1/12: Catrina Willis 01:22am
     -Hey u! wer u go hun?? me n grls in jasps wine bar lost u in pub thort u had gone 2 loo. Cu in 5mins xxx-
        
     Jane cursed softly; she, Catrina and the girls from the bank had hit the bars straight from work to celebrate Clare�s twenty-first. The cute barman in Bar Revolver had been plying them with Merlot and tequila slammers, they must have gone to Jasper�s after that. Her recollection was fuzzy, had she gone to Jasper�s?
     �Sod it.�
     Her thumb worked again on the key pad.
     Message 2/12: unknown 01:58am
     -Awake?-

     Jane frowned and stared at the number, it was not one she recognised. She had slipped her number to the barman; she remembered the wink and flashy smile as he pocketed her card. She felt a sudden stab of guilt.
     Message 3/12: Philip Moore 02:12am
     -U ok baby? Do u want me to pic u up I am awake so can do if u want. Txt me wen u want x-

     �S**t, s**t, s**t.� Jane hurriedly scrolled back up the messages and deleted the second message; it would have probably meant nothing to Phil even if he has found it. She could always say that it was a wayward text, a wrong number.
     Message 4/12: unknown 02:14am
     -Remember me? ;-)-

     Jane clicked her tongue in annoyance and deleted the message. Stupid bloody question. She puffed out her cheeks and blew cooling air up onto her face, it was so hot.
     Message 5/12: Catrina Willis 02:28am
     -2 drunk 2 stand getin cab home don�t know wer u r hun hope u had gud 1, fone me wen u get this maek sure u gt home ok xxx-

     Jane a sigh and cycled through the menu to call sender. The display blinked Network unobtainable. Irritated she shook her phone and tried again.
     Network unobtainable.
     She gave a grunt, �f*****g phone.� It was not the first time she had lost a connection at home; as soon as her contract is up she would be switching to another service provider.
     Message 6/12: Philip Moore 03:40am
     -U ok Jane? Its v late fone me wen u get this I will pic u up u drunken cow haha! X-

     She gave a slight smile; she could almost see Phil�s expression as she fell across the bonnet of his Audi and slid into the passenger seat. Last time she had been sick on his interior. Surely not again, she thought, he would be furious.
     �Honey?� She called out. Silence, unremitting. �S**t��
     Message 7/12: unknown 03:47am
     -I saw u again 2day but u didnt see me I waved but u carried on. I came 2 the bank but u didnt serve me the other day, it was yr fat friend the 1 with the bunches-

     Jane frowned, who the hell was this? Hurriedly she scrolled through her text history to see if the number matched any others; it did not.
     Part Message 8/12: unknown 03:48am
     -I didnt want 2 b rude but u wudnt c me yr fat friend the 1 with the bunches sed u were at lunch but u were in the bank. I told her that u new me fm wen we were at uni but she sed u were out-

     Part 2 Message 8/12: unknown 03:48am
     - yr fat frend shudnt lie 2 cutsomers!! Fat b***h!!!!!!!-

     Jane�s pulse began to race, her mind whirling as she deselected then selected the next message. She remembered something now about something that Melissa from the bank had said. A guy. Some weirdo, she had said, asking after her.
     Message 9/12: Philip Moore 04:02am
     -Ok babe not funny where r u? Cat has foned me she cant get hold of u on yr moby am worried now. Call me ASAP-

     Message 10/12: Catrina Willis 04:08am
     -Hunny where r u? Soz but I foned Phil as I can�t get u on yr fone. Fone me when u get in pse xx-

     Jesus, it was so hot, Jane blinked and drew a hand over her face as she quit out of her messages menu and cycled through missed calls.
     01:10am 9/6/06 � Catrina Willis
     01:17am 9/6/06 � Catrina Willis
     01:36am 9/6/06 � Catrina Willis
     01:56am 9/6/06 � Catrina Willis
     02:23am 9/6/06 � Catrina Willis
     03:15am 9/6/06 � Phillip Moore
     03:31am 9/6/06 � Phillip Moore
     03:33am 9/6/06 � Catrina Willis
     03:49am 9/6/06 � Catrina Willis
     04:01am 9/6/06 � Phillip Moore
     04:13am 9/6/06 � Phillip Moore
     04:16am 9/6/06 � Phillip Moore

     Jane hurriedly thumbed the return call button, again it flashed, Network unobtainable. Setting her jaw she depressed the call button again.
     Network unobtainable.
     Network unobtainable.
     Network unobtainable.

     She drew a breath and closed her eyes as another wave of nausea hit her and she struggled not to vomit. Her head was spinning and she pressed the phone against her forehead, drawing in shaking breathes. It was so hot.
     Jane cycled back to the final messages.
     Message 11/12: unknown 04:28am
     - Im sorry I shudnt get mad but u shood be nicer to peeple. U shudnt have left me like u did at uni and go off with that philipp f***a I will be going to see him next after I have seen yr fat frend 4 lying-

     She blinked as sweat rolled into her eyes, blurring the words of the next message. Lawrence? Jane rubbed her eyes feeling bile clawing up her throat as her heart began to thud. Lawrence Pierson? Surely not� She had hardly given him a thought in the three years she had been with Phillip. They had dated perhaps twice towards the end of her second year at University. He had sent her flowers a few times after but Phillip had put him in his place she had heard nothing. With her eyes closed she struggled to even picture him, shoulder length dark hair, thin faced, dark eyes, neither attractive not unattractive. A grey man in every sense. Not unlike the person Melissa had had removed from the lobby of the bank.
     Jane smeared the sweat matted hair from her eyes and started to read the last message, her throat tightening; it was stiflingly hot. The air was thick and even breathing was becoming difficult. As she levered herself up onto her elbows her head came into contact with something hard inches above her, something that creaked as if under tremendous strain in the darkness. Bringing her knees up hurriedly they too thumped against something hard above, involuntarily her feet kicked out sideways thudding uselessly at what sounded like wood on both sides. With her breathing coming in short ragged, panicky gasps she almost lost her grip on her mobile:
     Message 12/12: unknown 04:32am
     - I sed then I wud not let u go and I wil not give up. I hope u get these messeges cos I luv u, u no that, I told u wen I sent u the flowers but u did not want 2 meet me. Now it is ok cos u can stay near me and I can c u evryday. I hope u get the messeges cos I love u and I didn�t want to bury u 2 deep, if u luv me 2 pse txt me back and I wil cum and dig u out-

     Network unobtainable�.
     Network unobtainable�.
     Network unobtainable�.
     Network unobtainable�.

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Music courtesy of Marilyn Manson.

Author's Note

Again this bears no relation to any girlfriend I may have buried, alive or otherwise...

Reviews

[Steven Silvey]

Wow...He buried her! That's insanity. I had to laugh the whole way through this, because one of my best friends is named Philip Moore. Everytime he said something, I thought of Philip, lol. If you knew him, you'd see why it's funny to me.
So was it Lawrence!?
Is she okay!?
Great bit of mystery and suspense. The best I've read. Going into favorites, for sure.

[Misty_Prophet]

I'm so impressed with the ending! Short and captivating, definitely a great piece.

[Lost in Wonderland]

Oh my gosh! I love thus peice, every time i see your name as the author of a story i get excited. This stry was tense and well written. Absolutly incredible. The "network unobtainables" Just gave the story the needed feel of desparation. Absolutly loved this peice.

[Cherrie Palmer]

that was great!! I loved it Tales From The Crypt lookout

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

My oh my, I've been scared twice in one night. Your story Awake also kept me sitting on the edge of my seat. I wasn't too fond of the foul language, but it was appropriately placed in this piece. I put myself in Jane's predicament and I could hear myself voicing a few off color words. As I said with your first prize winner Charley, you should compile your stories into a collection and offer them for publication.
Keep up the good work and I know that I am speaking to a fellow author of the future.

Author: Nancy Lee Shrader
www.freewebs.com/booksbynancyleeshrader/

[VIMH (Voice In My Head)]

My God, this was great!

[Carla (trying to make e..]

that was just......oooo....crazy...your twists always get me....
carla

[dawnsue541]

Spookily funtastic!

[Bob Carney, "Soon ..]

Another masterful work. I was wondering what the f**k was up. Leaving out descriptions of the room she occupied and leaving her in the dark gloom was subtle. She didn't know she was buried alive. Having to find this out through her messages was creepy.
The suspense didn't start until he mentioned the fat b***h lying to him. After that, I found I was literally perched on the edge of my computer seat. My a*s is still sore lol. I stumbled a bit through the text vernacular, but didn't find it too hard to figure it out.

Message 12/12: unknown 04:32am
- I sed then I wood not let u go and I wil not give up. I hope u get these messeges cos I luv u, u no that, I told u wen I sent u the flowers but u did not want 2 meet me. Now it is ok cos u can stay near me and I can c u evryday. I hope u get the messeges cos I love u and I didn�t want to bury u 2 deep, if u luv me 2 pse txt me back and I wil cum and dig u out-

Network unobtainable�.
Network unobtainable�.
Network unobtainable�.
Network unobtainable�.

And so, the full horror of her situation unfolds. Brilliant to keep it to the last lines like all great writers. She really has no choice but to text him, but then again... network unobtainable.
Creepy, I f*****g loved this story mate. Cheers!!!

[Andrew Dunham]

Wow, nice one. Super tense and scary. I was wondering all the way through... where is she? What has happened? If you have your reader asking questions about the characters, then you have already drawn them into a good read. Well done. Even the modern txt speak was part of the loneliness and confusion. F**king txt spk does my nut. This is like a "Tales Of The Unexpected" episode (you remember, from the early 80s). Netork unavailable... so dramatic. A very up to the minute approach. The lst of messages seemed staccato, but I think that was the point. Just listening to the cheesy soundtrack now... heh heh... funny. "How deep is your love" snigger. I suggest the original would be even cheesier though....

[Roshayann D' Lyn]

Very nice, love the visuals. I think you have it as close as you can get it without experiancing it first hand. very beautifully written, the one sugjestion, she needs to be feeling more.............And no I won't go into that, yet. -R-