True sadness

This is the feeling I got on November 1st, 2008.

 

I felt true sadness

on that day.

Utter joy was gone.

I was so happy

when she said

"I'm pregnant"

and we rejoiced

with recless abandon.

It lasted two months.

Two months of happiness.

But then,

she dropped the bomb.

"I'm miscarrying my baby".

Those were her exact words.

It's strange how much words can hurt you.

Another sibling.

Gone.

First big sister dies,

now this?

"No",

I thought,

"I won't believe it!"

And true sadness,

utter sadness,

turned into despair.

Kicking.

Screaming.

Holding on for dear life.

My mother lays there,

in the hospital bed.

It's been a week since I got the news.

She's losing blood.

Lot's of blood.

I barry my face in her stomache.

They try to pry me off,

but I won't give up.

atleast without a fight.

Finally, they have me.

It took 4 nurces,

plus, my dad.

and now I'm sobbing.

Greaving.

Hurting.

All the way home.

They can't save the baby.

It's dead.

It's gone.

And just like that,

despair changes back,

into true sadness.

Author's Note

This is all true. A true story. A week after she miscarried, my mom had to go back to the emergency room, because she was bleeding so much. They had to pry me off of her hospital bed. i sobbed the whole way home. I have never been so hurt. never.

Reviews

[Angie Diane♥&hea..]

I'm sorry. This was a good write though. I know it's hard to lose a sibling. I don't know what I would do if I had lost any of my sisters. I think I would end up dying. I feel bad for her. I'm sorry. Thanks for sharing. :(

[PaperHearts]

This was a great write. It held so much honesty, vulnerability, and emotion, and I felt drawn into the moment as I was reading this! The balance between the short one-word lines and the longer lines worked really effectively, particularly towards the end. I'm sorry for the pain you've gone through! I appreciate you sharing this. :)
~PaperHearts

[NoAirToBreatheXSuffocat..]

oh gosh, otou-chan, i hope everything works out in the end. I really do, I hate sadness! :(

[Kia-chan!]

Thank you, thank you :)

[Keevan]

this...this is so sad, Mystery. I truely felt your pain reading this. you really vented through poetry.

[Daydreamer54]

Wow that's really sad. I know how you feel becuz my mom lost twins befor. Now i'm an only child. I can feel ur pain. :(

[Anonymous]

Oh my gosh I feel so bad for you... My mom also had a miscarriage but I haven't lost as much as you have. Such a good poem. So much emotion and sadness... I really love this. Excellent job, Kiah.