The beauty of the mind

"Let’s take a look at your most recent results" said the structure draped in a white robe. The young girl lay down as her palms became clammy, her right leg began to twitch incessantly as if constrained by some barrier. "so you're physicals are fine as usual" The pause that ensued had a malicious hint to it. "But I am afraid... Well you're brain activity it has been fluctuating". The figure began to focus away from the seemingly stressed girl and to the under polished, glistening floor. "We may have to extend you're voluntary stay". He silenced himself from this point onwards. His alabaster statue beginning to shift towards the exit in a mechanical manner. "I wish to leave" The girl expressed in a clear but hushed tongue. However due to unfortunate circumstance she was locked in alone. She shivered, encompassed by the four, dull dams. Ascending from her bed she observed her well known surroundings, jaggedly she began to walk towards the block of steel that was enveloped by a cushioned exterior.
Instantly with a sudden shift in her ethos she struck the door with new found force and rapidity, as she did this her fringe swished over to cover her left blue eye, revealing her more threatening yellow eye. No matter what language, no matter what description, no matter what passion is used to describe this girls inner strength it would be futile, as human capacity cannot be measured by any amount of words. The girl is called Victoria and she is remarkable. Every day she has fought for freedom that never comes, she has fought complacency that creeps consistently to constrain and control yet this spectacle of human persistence is the embodiment of exemption. Although she is caged and contained always. It is the purest form of sadness, when potential such as hers is restrained out fear. As she knocked, Dr J___ returned, white and corrupted. His hand contorted as the syringe attempted to find a silent path to poor Victoria's body. As the viscous liquid flowed into her, her blue eye became more prominent. She stumbled as the puppeteers strings metaphorically attached to each limb, bumbling and blundering as if her sitting on the bland bed was comparable to a bindle of sticks being dropped to the floor. Victoria lay there here eyes flickered on and off, in and out of sleep. she squirmed, a futile attempt in a endless battle as she drifted off leg twitching violently in protest the doctor left and the walls gleamed and grinned.

Footnote 

The report shows that Victoria is of great concern her erratic behaviour  has become more violent. I believe That she has linked her multiple personality disorder with her Heterochromia iridum (The differentiation of her eye colour) this has only caused more issues with her treatment while it is true that it causes her more advanced levels of creativity and intelligence it cannot be considered a positive due to effects it has on her already "vivid" imagination. We will up all doses of her medication and keep her docile, this may be deemed wrong or inhumane but I believe if we are to send her back to the real world she must become realistic and less imaginative.

In conclusion Victoria is dangerous her intellect is dangerous if we allowed someone of her manner to be free our establishment would be shut down, if questions are asked we tell them that her disorder has only worsened, she has caused significant injuries to myself and Dr J____ , furthermore her stay has been extended to the 1st of January 2018 by which time she will be "cured" and if not we shall push for a lobotomy and keep her contained. I can only hope you understand the severity of the situation and why this must be done it is unfortunate but I cant allow her to realize the truth of her potential and her "condition".
With sincerest regards
Mr O_____
Director of timekeeper asylum 

Author's Note

This is a new way of writing for me, so do you have any advice?

Reviews

[ANTO]

I dunno Niall. Times when I was reading it the language had me metaphorically punching the air (like 'she walked jaggedly' - excellent phrase) other times I was 'what does that mean'? (the embodiement of exemption - maybe semantically you meant 'excellence' ? Its has quite a few errors in punctuation

The story premise is sound - a world where having too good of an imagination gets you locked up/heavily medded and as a last resort lobotomised. Thats a potentially good story. What next though? She gets out into this strange world.All sorts of possibilities there a la Sarah Connors. It reads like a prologue the way it is at the minute but.. yeah .. I'd follow her adventures on the run or whatever.

I'll pass it over to one of the story writers here on WC and ask them if they'll assist. Im really not that into short stories mate. HTH

Niall - are you from the Emerald Isle at all - Im from Belfast?