I Have Never Been Afraid of Death.

I have never been afraid of death

or dying

or the dead.

I have never had a problem 

with the idea of my body 

going six feet under the ground one day.

I am not afraid of death.

I fear only

the side-effects 

of death-

Being forgotten,

Being honored with 

a dull funeral 

with lively people 

in dull colors 

with no flowers.

The thought of my grave 

in 200 years- 

overgrown with weeds

and moss.

At one point in my life I had a crush on death.

That is, I wanted to die.

I didn't care if it "wasn't yet my time."

I was tired.

No, I was exhausted.

I was angry.

I was angry with a capital "GR"

I was angry at God 

for what I was going through

I was angry at Death

for taking everyone I loved 

but not taking me.

But, most of all, I was angry at myself.

I knew that what I thought

And how I felt was not normal.

All I wanted was to die 

and the universe 

couldn't give me that one thing,

 that One simple little thing.

I just wanted to die,

 It's not like I was

 asking for 3 billion dollars 

 or something.

But I lived

I finally came to terms with the fact 

that I was going to be stuck with life for a while. 

I wasn't allowed to fade away. 

At least, not yet.

I have learned to live with life. 

I've learned to live

and love 

and give my all

to those who mean the most to me.

Yes, I'm over my crush on death

But I will never be able to fear it.

Reviews

[Philip Muls]

Your fear is about non-existence, not about death.

I believe we are all dreading our mortality but we are in constant denial.

Well done.

[Jaydaut]

"Please do not be afraid to critique my writing, I'm open to criticism, constructive and otherwise."

I'm responding because in your "about" paragraph you expressed an interest reading a review of your writing that obviously caught my attention.

So here we are; I've read, "I have never been afraid of death" your poem wherein you share your rational in support of the proclamation which is the title and subject of your writing...and if truth be told, I would be forced to admit that I myself might have written as much at your age, and probably did.

However, I put those thoughts out of my mind and I suggest you do the same - at once and without hesitation.

Always remember: Cowards die a million deaths, while the brave die but once.