Home Deep with Pained Memories

unfinished,just started.Chapter 4.I wrote some more,I will continue to write more,please hang in there!!

When i got home my parents did something surprising,they lectured me about leaving without say and being gone for SO long.Most of the time they didn't notice if i come or leave,I've done this before too.I listened to them go on and on to what seems like forever while staring down at the floor until then they started arguing at each other,which was my Que to go up stairs to my room.

 

My sister's bedroom was at the end of the hall from mine,i couldn't help but to just stare at it before finally going into mine.I closed my curtains and curled up in my bed.Ugh,I need to mull things over,too much s**t happening.I have a headache already,i can hear my parents,but i don't want to.Fumbled around in my dark,messy room until i found my Ipod,I played Norah Jones because it soothes me.

Closing my eyes i thought of Eru,his short,slick black hair and smiling face,It's relieving to be away from home with him but he has unknown problems of his own.Then i thought of my sister.Her long brunette curls,always smiling just like Eru does.Hiding her pain her pain,is what she was doing the whole time,with her jokes and never shedding a tear.Hurt deep inside,that i didn't see,I should've seen,paid more attention to her.

Is it that serious,never having your period?Never having a boyfriend or friends?If it were me I would've been fine but i guess me(her only friend) leaving her to be on my own didn't help her.Why was she so introverted?She's beautiful,great smile,perfect lips,what imperfection did she see on herself that she would go so far?She's not mute,those stupid rumors.

That one night,she really wanted to talk to me,now that i think about it,she sounded desperate,worried,more buggy than usual.She wanted me to stay,she said she needed a serious talk,about mom and dad,something about her,she needed to talk to me.Dad was still working,working late,coming home late,as usual.Mom was doing a late shift at the Hospital she worked at.Then later that night hearing my cell phone ring,which it hardly ever does,from my mom,none the less,should've been a hint but i ignored it.

I continued to try to flirt with the boys at the docks,where other teens come to have late night parties.Coming home to seeing my mom having her face in her hands crying,at first i thought,she argued with dad on the phone that maybe they were finally gonna do it,divorce but no it was something more major than i thought.Sobbing,she barely choked out that 3 hours ago my sister hung herself,in her room.My mother came home early,found her like that,rushed her to the hospital but it was too late,she was gone.

NO!I didn't come home to remember!...I curled up even tighter and buried myself under my blankets.I woke up,must've fallen asleep for a few minutes,it was still light out.I turned over to see my clock,just as i thought it's now 9am.I sat up slowly,then finally realized i was still in my cold,frigid shorts and stuck to my,skin tank top.I picked out my winter jeans,tight and long,and my black shirt which was more like a dress for it's sleeves and bottom was so long.

I went out of my bedroom to shower,but i stopped frozen,heart stopping,mind blank again from staring at my sister's door,her room.I haven't dared to enter since the five days ago.What would it be like?If i were to enter...maybe it was a dream,if i enter,will she still be there on her bed,reading or doing her usual paintings?I stomped over and bolted in,like usual expecting her to get excited for me to enter.

My heart dropped,she wasn't there.The stale,stile way of her room was the same,it smelled like her but it was dark,empty...too dark,too empty,it hurt,my heart sank,i was disappointed.She isn't here...she really is gone.It was my fault,i should've stayed,she wouldn't have done it.

I closed the door slowly,walked quietly to the towel cabinet,all i hear was silence,i had no idea if anyone was home or what is going on.I took my shower,a one with hot water,i took my time,not wanting to leave this small,calming,warm place,to not knowing what that empty house had.

I stared at myself in the mirror,My short,blunt,bob hair style,it was too messy,not elegant as i hoped it would look on me,i wanted to look older,elegant,filled like a women,like other girls my age already seemed to be.I can't imagine how Eru saw me through his eyes,I used to know my sister saw me beautiful through her eyes.

Wait...why was i thinking of Eru,i thought,at a time like this?!I'm so shameless,conceited,Selfish!I sighed heavily,ran down stairs and out the door again,not seeing a sight of mom or dad or any living thing ever being in our kitchen or family room.

Author's Note

Okay,what'cha think?

Reviews

[PrincessZeldaWannabe]

So her parents do care lol? Can't wait to get to know her sister!