Inspiration

Not really a poem, i dont know what to call it!

Inspiration

I’ve been accused of being rather glum when I type… It’s not a fault or shortcoming, it’s just that I write sad things. Day in, day out sad thoughts flow forth from my pen, according to some people. But i’m not a sad person, really. I have plenty of things that make me happy. Sunsets over the ocean make me happy. Their warm orange rays dancing across the ripples of the water in their final moments of freedom. My dogs make me happy. The way they give you all their attention, without a single falsehood. They never use you, never steal from you, never hurt you as long as you do the same to them. But of all things, writing makes me the happiest. In my mind there are fantastic landscapes with awe-inspiring stories. In my writings, I can do anything, be anything, say anything. It expresses what my flesh cannot. And thus, if my flesh cannot express the sadness my pieces emanate, then I am better for it. My writing cycle requires a certain give-and-take from reality. It gives me inspiration, and I take it… usually. My inspirations are usually rather sad, because in my soft life i’ve grown accustomed to the feeling of joy. I wake up every morning to a world my God has created for me. A world so full of wonder and mirth, that how could there be anything better? I’ve lived in this world for my short 18 years, been surrounded with amazing fonts of knowledge, and lived a good life… But i’ve become so accustomed to being happy, that I only get inspired when i'm feeling down. Its a new feeling for me, I think. ‘I was happy all last week, then it feels like a bulldozer is running me over’. Thats what inspires me. Because when im so down, i can take a look at myself. Remind myself that I’m being a fool and remember that there are things in life worth living for. Cool summer nights, with the stars as your only companions. The look in someone’s eyes that tells you they love you as much as you love them. Hugs from the only girl in your universe. Parties with friends where you can let loose and just be you. This is what life is about. It’s about inspiration to do great things. Today we get so caught up in work, that everything else is white noise against the buzz of our computer screens. So caught up in what people think about us that we forget about what God thinks of us. So caught up in the awful black web that is society… That we can’t get out.

So to all the girls who cut themselves because ‘He’ Doesn’t seem to see you exist, turn around. Because there’s a guy standing there who KNOWS you exist. You’re all he can think about some days, and he tries so hard to smile when you tell him about how you love another man… Because all he wants is for you to be happy. But those scars peeking out from under your sweater tell him you’re anything but.

And to the kids who are pushed to the brink of existence by bullies… It gets better. I promise you there’s no reason to load that gun. There are so many beautiful things waiting out there for you. Just hold on a little longer. I know your world would be so much easier without those punks in it, but no great man has ever risen without resistance.

No matter who you are, what race, what color. Height, weight, acne scars, razor cuts, bruises, chipped teeth and taped glasses do not matter. You are someone’s muse. someone’s inspiration.

Author's Note

this is a piece i originally wrote to make me feel better about a certain aspect of my life, but grew, as much writing does, into something more.

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[Marie]

THis is actually what I'd call a "blog". It's very happy.