Should We Raise Children Without Gender Roles?

Should We Raise Children Without Gender Roles?

A Story by H.S. King

In a modern day society where battles for equality are being fought - and won - everywhere, why do we still put restrictions on our children based on their gender? Thee are different sections in stores for boys' and girls' when it comes to toys, clothes and shoes. Many parents allow this and follow the example that their parents set, using these gender roles as a way to teach their children. I'm sure all parents do the best job they can but in this modern age, is it acceptable for this to continue? A minority of parents are paving the way for the next generation to define who they are alone instead of pressuring them to fill moulds that have been prepared since long before their birth.
Gender roles can cause serious mental problems. When parents, teachers and other children convey ideas that impose gender roles, such as men being strong or women being pretty, they are automatically sharing stereotypes with their children. As children grow, they become more aware that they don't necessarily fit the stereotypes and become self conscious. This can affect their self esteem, confidence and make them more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety. This can cause other problems such as self-harm, eating disorders and an increased risk of suicide. The most shocking, and also worrying, thing about it is that the adults often don't realise that the media are imposing gender roles on children they're around. In a survey, 64% of parents said that they would buy their son a doll. However, many boys won't ask for a doll because the advertisements for Baby Annabelle are all with girl-only casts. It's the same way that a young girl wouldn't ask for a Star Wars lightsaber because the advert doesn't show any girls playing with them. As soon as children realise that their gender is something that affects the way they're treated, they start to conform. They start to fit the stereotypes because Disney tells them to and the adults with the power to stop it let it continue. Teaching children that they should conform to stereotypes is a reason that we should remove gender roles from the upbringing of children because the mental effects breed self hatred in lieu of individuality. If the choice we have to make is between good mental health or archaic gender roles, is there really any choice? The change in attitude is already becoming apparent. Sweden has recently adopted a new gender neutral pronoun and started to mix the genders - a girl now appears in the advert for a Nerf gun and boys have started featuring in adverts for dolls. If Sweden can do it, why can't the rest of us? What they're doing isn't difficult. They're simply showing children that they can play with any toy they want but it's making the world of difference. 
The abolition of gender roles of the past proves that we do not need gender roles to be successful. In the past, girls would be sent off for marriage with a dowry - money, animals or other products of worth to allow their husbands to sustain them. Families would effectively sell their teenage daughters - and this was a social norm. If we can change society enough to be shocked or angered by that, then clearly we do not need gender roles as much as we think. They are subject to change as time passes and in a time where gender is losing its importance and being yourself is the new trend, we don't need to impose the abstract, yet restricting, terms and conditions of gender on our children. 
I am not saying raise children without gender. Leading child psychologists agree that, for many children, gender is an important part of their identity and removing it entirely could be harmful. However,not placing gender restrictions on children can only allow their personalities to flourish. Rules like don't hit and good behaviour are also necessary but it's up to us to remove things like "boys don't hit girls", "boys will be boys" and "you're a girl, act like it" from the vocabulary of the world and replace them with more gender inclusive rules. The singular aim of any parent should  be to raise their children to be good people, not to conform. The last thing a child needs is to have the previously discussed negative effects of gender roles placed upon them. 
Equality in childhood encourages people to fight for equality in the future. The removal of gender roles for our children is the way to close the pay gap and ensure that our daughters are not paid 17.5% less than their male counterparts. This would benefit both men and women by  creating a fairer and more cooperative working environment for everyone. Also, it would be a step in breaking  the glass ceiling - the invisible barrier that allows women to see the top jobs but stops them from achieving promotions. By breaking barriers like this, we all progress and stop the boy vs. girl habits of the present day. The pay gap also makes women more likely to live in poverty and suffer poor health. Furthermore, once women are in top jobs, young women will have role models. Girls are less likely to pursue  a career if it has few women on boards or in CEO positions, for example. Removing gender roles is the only way to ensure equality in the future and progress as a society.
In conclusion, I think that children should be raised without gender roles. They can cause serious mental damage and result in inequalities throughout life. By removing the restrictive gender roles, we allow children the freedom to be themselves and help create a future where women aren't in poverty for being women and men aren't trapped in abusive households because they're ashamed that a woman is hitting them and won't stand up for themselves. The removal of gender roles is for the benefit of society overall and should be adopted as soon as possible.

Bibliography
Putnam, J. (2013). Influences on children's gender development. Available. https://www.extension.purdue.edu/providerparent/Child%20Growth-Development/InfluencesONGender.htm
Last accessed 18th September 2015
Aina, O.E. (2011) Why does gender matter? Counteracting stereotypes with young children. Available. http://southernearlychildhood.org/upload/pdf/Why_Does_Gender_Matter_Counteracting_Stereotypes_With_Young_Children_Olaiya_E_Aina_and_Petronella_A_Cameron.pdf
Last accessed 18th September 2015
Unknown. (2013). Consequences of low self-esteem. Available.
http://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/self-esteem/consequences-of-low-self-esteem/#.VfMhgkZwaSE
Last accessed 18th September 2015.
Unknown. (2015). Sweden adds gender neutral pronoun to dictionary. Available. http://www.theguardian.com/world/2015/mar/24/sweden-adds-gender-neutral-pronoun-to-dictionary
Last accessed 18th September 2015.
Crouch, D. (2013). Toys R Us's Stockholm Superstore goes gender neutral. Available. http://www.theguardian.com/world/2013/dec/23/toys-r-us-stockholm-gender-neutral
Last accessed 13th October 2015.
Ditum, S. (2012). Sweden makes my gender-free toy Christmas wish come true. Available. http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2012/nov/27/sweden-christmas-gift-girl-nerf-gun
Last accessed 13th October 2015

© 2017 H.S. King


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I just agree, you make some great points and the sources are reliable.

Posted 7 Years Ago



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Added on January 30, 2017
Last Updated on January 30, 2017
Tags: gender, children, parenting, controversial

Author

H.S. King
H.S. King

United Kingdom



About
I'm 17 and I'm from Scotland. I mostly write poetry and some short stories but I might publish some of my essays. Feel free to take a look around and leave reviews or rate my work, that's why I'm here.. more..

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