Silver Lining

What happens when you can't see the light, and you can't see the dark?

I’m here

I’m not happy

I’m not sad

I’m not angry

I’m not mad

I’m just here.

I have lived in the negativity of the world my entire life

 so when I’m happy…

it’s scary.

I don’t want to be happy

When I’m happy I’m not me

I live in the silver lining.

When you live in the dark, it’s hard to see the light

When you live in the light, you can’t see the dark.

So I hide in the shadows.

I’m not in the light

I’m not in the dark

I’m just here

I use it to help others. 

When I see someone in the dark…

I guide them towards the light.

I want to be your light in times of darkness.

Sometimes it’s hard though

You fall into bad habits

When you fall into those habits...

you join the dark side

When you have known negativity your entire life…

You don’t see the world as others view it.

I’m still haunted

I still get nightmares

I still get flashbacks

I still feel the pain

I still have anxiety

I still have depression

I still have the memories

My demons follow me…

day …

after day…

after day

They are a part of who I am though.

Without my nightmares…

I can’t be on alert.

Without the flashbacks…

I can’t see when there’s danger.

Without the anxiety…

I don’t feel safe.

Without the memories…

I’m lost

I know they will never go away

They are my past

They guide me toward the future

They help me in the present

They are a part of me

They are me

So no

I don’t want to be happy

I don’t want to be sad

I want to be here

I want to be your light in times of darkness

That’s just who I am

I am me

Demons and all

Reviews

[Zoya]

it's rightly said-"better to expose your dark side than hide it." And I'm glad you did in this poem. It was a mixture of sadness and compassion. I liked it.

[Nwang]

Angsty and gray, I like your darkside and the poem expresses it very truthfully.

[KayLinn]

Thank you. We all need to have a dark side, otherwise we'll go insane

[Nwang]

I cannot help but agree.

[AmandaFuller]

I LOVE this. Wonderful job. Keep it up.