Was It A Cheap Goodnight?

Or was it?

1.

We will never grow old

And we will be young forever

And when the wrinkles trees collapse

And the smokeless lightning crashes over dead water

I will reach for your hand

Trace the hard blue veins running, like highways,

To the room where my heart lies with yours

And we’ll close the curtains

Pour ourselves two sour glasses of tequila

And disappear into the carnation buzz

Of a love so deep, so god-driven,

That when death jars our tears at last

And looks back at the city of our ruin

It will fade into pillars of salt.

 

2.

It’s lovely

The sunlight as it sinks into these white walls

In turning patterns like picture books

With shadows for pages

And I collide with the water color I keep of you

Framed in silver snow, wine red orchids, and ivy mornings

Hanging on the backdrop of my darkest hour, my endless pains

And you, my love,

Stretch out your arms

And all of those nightmares, those failures, those drunk evenings and cashed cigarettes,

Those torn curtains and burned manuscripts, become nothing

Nothing but scars where splinters once slept

And you, my love, become the only color in a storm of black and white-

 

3.

My fingers slow dance across your skin

And my eyes fill up wine bags

On the shore of your brilliance

As passion, like violent hail, throws bodies against the door of my heart

Praying, wanting, lasting, craving only this:

An evening with crushed clocks

Blooming stars

The smell of distant rain

And you-

 

4.

Remember when you locked yourself in the bathroom

And you let your tears fall

Like rainwater down window panes

And I slipped love notes with ink hearts under the door

And promised I’d sit there until Wednesday

You knew I was serious

So you opened the door

Smiled like a sun rise in Tuscany

And you let me hold you and swear it would be alright-

Oh, and remember when we walked down your gravel driveway barefoot

Buried ten inches into one another because the May night was cold and dark

And the stars hung like burning Chinese lanterns

And all I wanted to do was lie in a foreign field with you

And feel you-

Oh, and remember when you climbed onto the table

And you swore you’d never come down

All because of some charcoal-colored spider

And I laughed and laughed and you made me shove it down the drain-

Oh, I remember it all

And I remember wanting nothing else

But to hold you in my arms

Like old lovers, smoking coffee, and a swinging chair on a porch

In some country post card

And whisper something delicate in your ear

Something warm, something forever

Like ‘I love you’-

 

5.

The mistake, I realized

After lighting up a cold cigarette

And kicking a stone down your driveway,

Was not in me leaving

But ever having said goodnight

To you

Again.

Reviews

[emmah]

it left me speechless at first. only on the fifth read did i begin to comprehend this one - only then did i let the bone deep sadness in this verse really hurt. it is a tale of love and loss that is so pure and so overwhelming in the minute details it recalls, the desires it conjures, the understated sense of regret it brings out and the meaninglessness of what has transpired.
it is a love "so deep, so god-driven" that craves salt tequila tears. it is a deep love that keeps "the water color" of her "framed in silver snow, wine red orchids, and ivy mornings". it is a deep love that makes, by a stretch of the arms, "all of those nightmares, those failures, those drunk evenings and cashed cigarettes, those torn curtains and burned manuscripts, become nothing".
"the only color in a storm of black and white" - what can i even begin to say to that!
the potentially mundane - locked in the bathroom walking on a gravel driveway barefoot and climbing on the table - are transformed, with the aching brilliance of your quill into overwhelming mega events. i could see the narrator slip "love notes with ink hearts under the door". i heard his voice when he promised he'd "sit there until Wednesday. i believed her believe him. and the sun did, indeed, rise in all it's glory in tuscany.
the winter was a biting cold that May night and i saw them "buried ten inches into one another" as they let the gravel of the driveway imprint their soles forever.
the "charcoal-colored spider" crawled across my room and i saw it being shoved down the drain surrounded by laughter and hysteria.
they were "old lovers" already, to me, as a reader. "smoking coffee and a swinging chair on a porch". i wonder if he did, in fact, whisper that "something warm, something forever, like 'I love you'" in her ear, or did it stay suspended in the thick winter air, like fog.
it's a verse that traveled miles and oceans, that left me feeling more than just a tinge of pain, as a reader. you have an exceptionally unique poetic voice and soul, dear poet.

[Tate Morgan]

I imagine this is the reason for your bitter bear taste in the mouth .As sad excuse for a human. Try being nice that would probably get you further in life than your apparent assumption that breeding gives meaning and rank to an otherwise sad excuse for a human.

[miSS LEaf]

couldn't help but feeling an Eliot influence in this rich reading.. my comment is simple: i love it! fav
~L

[Miss Coral]

Wow.
A torrent of vivid imagery and wildy real emotions. Incredible piece, the description of what so many of us go through. This was absolutely amazing. I don't think I can describe it any further without sounding half crazed.
Wow.
Into my library it goes then.

[Antonio Valentino]

Digging your pen poet. Good stuff!

Antonio