I took two pills tonight, down in the ruts again you know.But why? I saw the pictures of me as a child on the counter top.Where did that go?I’ve become a sod, a soiled miser, a recluse, self-destructive, amoral, stamped and plastic-wrapped: insane.And I’ve lost the enthusiasms I once had as a young boy, you know, like staying up all night Christmas eve excited as all hell.Now I dread Christmas.It means more family time.It’s cold.I have to spend 2 days returning s****y gifts and making up excuses for why I missed giving something to someone else.But how did it come to this?
That’s right.That turn back there, you know, the fork in the road by Desolation Row and Salinas.I should have gone left.
i know what u mean when u wish u could just be left alone and u no longer enjoy the things you used to...this was a very dark poem but it was rlly good...maybe try making stanzas instead of having it in paragraph form...other than that, it was a rlly good poem :)
Now I understand your malicious review. YOU didn't win "the best" in the contest whereas I did. Hmmmm, imagine my surprise upon learning this. Why you submitted this piece when you have many better pieces (yes, I've read a few) is beyond me. Not even close to one of your best. And from your attitude on display within the few words on your home page, I'm not sure why you even cared to submit to begin with.
Not quite as good as the previous piece of yours I read. Understand the feelings, but a very typical "wrong path" kind of writing. Could definetely be better. Much more angst and the reasoning behind the feelings might help.
i know what u mean when u wish u could just be left alone and u no longer enjoy the things you used to...this was a very dark poem but it was rlly good...maybe try making stanzas instead of having it in paragraph form...other than that, it was a rlly good poem :)