Omnipotent

 

The car ride is dripping with an awkward silence. I am spending my time watching street signs as we drive. The streets overflow with college students enjoying the nightlife. I haven't seen this much life in a long time. I feel the car jerk as it comes to a sudden stop. Dad springs out of the car, slamming the door behind him.

 

"Ares, you are killing me today. Get with it!" he yelled as he took off impatiently toward the bar door.

 

I follow. Country music spills out into the night as I open the door to enter. My father is standing in a group of men exchanging handshakes. I join them as they take a seat in a nearby booth. A young waitress greets us with a friendly smile. She whips out her notepad, smacking her gum in her mouth, and scribbles our orders abruptly. She scurries away just in time to avoid their cheesy pickup lines. I zone out as the men whine about how terrible the work day treated them. Despite the lively crowd of people, the room is unsettling.

 

Is this a trap? No. They never mess with me this early on, but then again I cheated my way inside this round. They can cheat too.

 

A slap on the back causes me to jump. The group of men stare at me with a look of confusion.

 

"Whoa! Calm down kiddo," my father says as he raises his glass.

 

I lift my glass to join the celebration. The men clash their beer glasses into ours with loud laughs. I do my best to keep up with the guys. Three rounds of drinks later, the alcohol takes effect. The rooms dark mood turns inviting. I feel a nudge on my arm. Dad points to a woman sitting alone at the bar.

 

"Someone is interested," he says in a childish voice.

 

 The group erupted with whistles and nudges, causing attention. I wasn't sure if the girl had heard the comment or was just amused by the spectacle. She let out a small laugh as she raised her hand with a flirty wave. My father practically threw me out of the booth. I had no choice now but to talk to her.

 

The men are burning a hole into my back with their stares. The girl rose out of her chair in anticipation of my steps. The alcohol is giving me false courage. My anxiety lowers with each step.

 

The girl never breaks eye contact with me. Before I know it, I’m standing right in front of her. She leans her head close to my ear. I can feel her breath on my neck as she speaks.

 

"What is your name?" she coos.

 

"Ares," I reply without thinking.

 

"Ares... a girl could get used to saying that every night," she retorts. 

 

Her words cause goosebumps to form on my arms. She takes money out of her purse and places it onto the bar countertop. I see her glance at the doorway before she looks back at me. I know that this is a dangerous choice, but I continue. I allow her to lead me out into an alleyway.

 

We barely turn the corner before I find myself up against a brick wall. She kisses me eagerly as my hands explore her body. I pull myself away mid-kiss keeping my hands firmly on her hips.

 

"Wait, I don't even know your name," I say breathlessly

 

"Emery," she says 

 

The streetlight offers a better view of the woman. In the last 15 minutes, I hadn't stopped long enough to take her in. Her black hair tumbles over her shoulders in loose curls. Hints of bright blue hair dye peak through the bottom layer. The black dress she is wearing clings to her body in all the right places, leaving little to the imagination. Glitter eyeshadow pops against her pale skin tone, but despite all that it is, her lips that hold my attention. Once dressed in red lipstick, now flush with natural color from our friction.

 

I attempt to pull her back into a kiss, but she stops me. Her hand is pressing on my chest, seemingly measuring my heartbeat.

 

"Come home with me," she says while tilting her head up at me.

 

I nod. She grabs my arm and pulls me further down the alleyway. I pause, as I hear someone shouting my name from afar. Emery tugs me harder trying to get my attention back on her, but I win the tug of war.

 

"Just a minute, I promise," I say to her.

 

She looks at me annoyed but follows. I make my way back to the front of the bar in enough time to see my father throwing up in a sewer grate. A friend is holding his keys and jacket.

 

"Ew," Emery says in a disgusted tone. She turns her face away from the sight, letting go of my hand.

 

"I will drive him home," I say reaching for the keys.

 

I hear Emery huff behind me.

 

"No reason for him to ruin your night. I will drive him home, enjoy yourself," his friend says while tossing me the keys to my father’s car.

 

 The man hoists my dad up, guiding him towards his vehicle before I can protest his offer.

 

"Look, I know you are upset but let’s-" I start to say.

 

 Emery is gone.

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

A very interesting chapter. I like the way you made the situation come alive for the reader. I liked the interaction of the characters and the ending. Thank you my friend for sharing the excellent chapter.
Coyote

[matrixmark]

The opening sentence is good, i quite liked that.

Throughout the piece- watch your full stops, because the word which starts mmediately afterwards needs to have a gap between the full stop and the start of the sentence.

Change this...." Whoa, take it easier kiddo," my father says as he raises his glass

To this..........."Whoa! take it easy kiddo" my father said as he raised his glass

Change this......The black dress she is wearing grabs her in all the right places leaving little to the imagination.

To this............The black dress she is wearing, clings to he body in all the right place; leaving little to the imagination.

Change this......She grabs my arm and pulls me a little farther down the alleyway.

To this.............She grabs my arms and pulls me further down the alleyway.

Change this.......I hear someone screaming my name. I pause.

To this..............I pause, as i hear someone shouting my name out from afar.

I enjoyed it...don't take the above changes as a negative, I am just trying to help the wording flow.

I enjoyed the scene when the where there was lots of drink involved - that was pretty cool. Good sense of passion between emery and Ares - I think you could expand on this bit a little bit more.

Overall I enjoyed it.

Mark.