The Greatest Girlfriend I Never Had

I did, in fact, "have" this girl after writing this poem for her...at least for four years. I have recently lost her again. I would regain her, let me know if you have any ideas!

You're the greatest girlfriend I never had
Those pure, unspoken hopes could never last
Though even in defeat you've made me glad
Dreams dreamt so long that came and went so fast
Yet you make me so maudlin with pleasure
Utterly incoherent in my bliss
You vex and confound me beyond measure
As I fantasize each smile hides a kiss
You're my continuous inspiration
Though you laugh off my every flirtation
You give each day cause for celebration
And my every cell its animation
I'm buzzing with your electricity
Can't you see only you do this to me?

Reviews

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

This is so beautiful. It speaks of a love that has left its thumbprint upon your heart, though over, has remained a part of your life. I know this feeling only to well. I'm a firm believer that love returns to its source, however. All of the love and vibrational energy that you feel is a result of your love for her. You retain that even though she's gone. One day you'll be able to share that with someone else, someone who will be able to open her heart and share the same with you. Then, the two of you will be unstoppable, tripping the light fantastic.

Well penned!

[Robert Tusitala O'Neill]

Tripping the light, fantastic indeed, Linda!! Thank you, and I appreciate the help and your positive enjoyment more than you know. I share fairly rarely (hey, that rhymes!). I have many, many poems though. I am very glad for the helpful comments! The word maudlin bothers me. The original word there was "retarded," but I knew that was very honestly NOT the correct diction. The emotion I mean to express is the feeblemindedness of early love. The fumbling high you get in, burning with realized desire. Any two or three syllable words for that would be greatly appreciated.