More Than A Wake Up Call!!

This essay is about how I was living my life in the negativity for awhile until God woke me up and changed myself back to my regular self. The way that God made me to be!

I don’t even know where to start with my journey ever since I’ve been away from my close friend, my laptop. Yes, you’ve heard right, my friends! Things that I never thought would happen in my life, happened. Never say never is a pretty good quote to live by, my friends!

     I think that starting where my life started to go down hill would be a pretty good place to start, if you might say. I believe that it would make a little bit more sense, right? Well, I hung out with the wrong crowd all the time. I hung out with them, because you know they did all the cool things, and you know these days if you do the cool thing, then you must be cool too, right? Hah’ that’s not always true. I myself can tell you that! I did everything they did: curse, have bad attitude and just look at life in a negative way. I found myself to be very conceded. I was always thinking about myself, before others. Deep deep down inside of my heart I loved helping others, but the attitude that covered and drowned me into the soul less person was dragging me down every second of the day that I was living out. I wanted out, but I was scared of changing and let me tell you something. You know that one quote, “ You have to change yourself, before you can change anything,” right? Well, that replayed a lot in my life. I thought if I want to change the world like I want and plan on doing, than why am I not focusing on myself first? Why am I letting these people ruin my future by every second?

       It started to get worse as the days went on. Attitude and the way I lived my life. I wasn’t who I really was and only the people that really loved and knew me deep down knew that this wasn’t the real me. I was faking my life. One person that really had a big part in this is God. Yeah, I believed in God and went to church, but I was just another teen that blew it all off. I didn’t live by what I learned at church and from my parents that are big believers in God, as well.

        One day I had gotten in a fight with at one time she was my friend and she was the person I told everything to and these days you can’t really trust anyone with your personal life,ok? But she went and told everyone a lot of my business to pretty much the whole ninth grade and you know what it seemed like the whole ninth grade ended up being the whole school. People around school knew me as someone that “ got around”. I guess I thought in the back of my mind that if I got myself out there and get to know the guys here I would feel better about myself but really deep down inside I knew what I was doing was completely wrong. After the day of getting into the fight with the used to be friend, my mom had developed the disappointment in herself. She never quite yelling at me about the situation. From the thought of me not being me and her repeating that she missed her old daughter. The one that cared for people and the daughter that loved others. At the moment I didn’t care. No care was left inside of me. I felt like God had left my life, but really I had left mine. I had left God’s side. I had pushed God out of my life and let me tell you, this is what happens when you push God away. Trust me He’ll always bring you back when you really need it. It all came down to me running away from home. I’ll write a whole nother’ story on that, because it’s a lot to explain, but that was a scary experience. But did you think that scared me deep inside? NO!

      Yes, I ran away again? Why? Well, this time it was because it got to where I was posting inappropriate pictures of myself on the one and only, Instagram. Yes, I  got likes like crazy and people putting my picture on their own pages. Comments were flying, but when I got to school boys wanted more from me. I loved the attention more than anything! I thought this was a great time in my life, but was it really, Hope? No! Well, later on, my youth director at church had called my dad one night and informed them about the picture. They got a look at it all and took away all my celluar devices that I had in my pocession. During school the next day I had used my school ipad to text this one guy that I had been talking to fo

r awhile and he came and got me after school. I never did show up home and from there I knew my mom was going to have a breakdown. This would be the second time I ran away from home. I’ll tell you about more of the second runaway later on in another story, but really my life was falling apart.

     Inside I was craving a change. I wanted God back in my life. I sat in a conversation about joining the military and let me tell you, I used to be against joining the military, but I gave it a thought. I could do it, until I was informed that I couldn't, because I was born without one kidney. So, I can’t join the military with only one kidney, which kind of made me sad. But that’s not where it all stopped, my friend. One Saturday morning I woke up feeling nothing, but joy and fulfillment in my life and inside of myself. I don’t think I have ever felt better in my life. Honestly, I felt like I was being born again. So, throughout the day, I figured that I want and need to change. So, I did. That included dropping my bad habits and bad friends which were also my bad influences.

    Yes, it took me about a week or so to stop cursing and I prayed to God that He would help me through this process and let me tell you, He did. He gave me the strength I needed. He was there with and for me, more than anyone. I dropped the bad music I used to listen to and I’m more happier than ever! My attitude is way more positive than ever! The message is if you ever want to change, just know that you can. If you ever need help, just know that God is there to help you, especially if He’s pulling at your heart to change, you need to listen or He’ll make you, like me.

Author's Note

Please leave comments!!!

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

A very good story. The reader could feel the struggle and I like the ending.
"If you ever need help, just know that God is there to help you, especially if He’s pulling at your heart to change, you need to listen or He’ll make you, like me. "
Sometime we need to hit rock bottom to see the opportunities in a life. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[Heartful5160]

Thank you for reading my experience and thank you for the review! I'm glad God made me go through those struggles, because it made me realize how far away I was from Him. But I'm so glad I allowed Him back in my life! He's done nothing, but good for me! Thank you again!

[Coyote Poetry]

I'm glad and you are welcome.

[Mert]

İn some periods of our lifes,all of us actually experience these most of things happened from you.We try many things to look very cool without thinking they are good or not.When the time passed,then these all of things seem very ridicilous to us and we don't genereally believe in ourselves.It's good to see the changing about your life.Thanks for your writing.

[Heartful5160]

Thanks for taking the time to read my work and placing a review! I see my change as a good story to tell people. Some people consider it inspiring and worth sharing! But thanks again!

[Justin]

that was really good :) u were able to put your experience out there, which in return is going to help people out, knowing that they are not alone out there :) great job :)

[Heartful5160]

Thank you for reading my work. It really means a lot!! My experiences are something I want to share with people throughout the world in my life. I believe that God let all those happenings in my life to be something for me to share with others, because He knows that it would help and motivate other people around the world. Thank you for the review and comments! Please go and check out more of my work if you don't mind! Thank you !

[Justin]

your welcome, i will check out the rest of your material :)

[Heartful5160]

Thank you very much!!!

[Justin]

your welcome, if u have time, can you please look at my material, thanks :)

[Heartful5160]

Yes, I will!

[Justin]

thanks :) :) :) :) :)

[Heartful5160]

No problem!