Morning in the kitchen

The sunshine is beating through the flower-print kitchen blinds, making the patterns more vivid. Outside, birds are tittering. A gentle breeze is wafting through the window, and through the cat-flap, making it tap. Mrs Wilson and her daughter Kate come down the stairs and into the kitchen. Mrs Wilson rolls up the blinds and opens the window a little more. She then notices Charlie, who has been sitting on a chair at the breakfast bar for a while now, listening to the birds outside.

“Good-mornin’ Charlie” Mrs Wilson says cheerfully

“It’s about time”

“I bet you’re hungry as me young man” she smiles.

“Probably not, I didn’t get up for a midnight snack at three this morning”

“Don’t give me that look, it’s coming”

Mrs Wilson fixes Charlie a bowl of small brown pellets, something that awful looking has to be nutritious. Charlie slides off the chair and walks over to the bowl.

“This again” Charlie huffs. “At least it smells relatively edible”

“Toast nearly done mum?”

“Almost love”

“Now I would love some toast, and some coffee”

“C’mon eat it up”

“I don’t want it, you know I’m just going to steal some of your toast and coffee anyway”

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m tired and this tastes like s**t”

The toaster pops up

“How many slices do you want, love?”

“Three”

“You want jam on all of them?”

“No, can I get one with Marmite?”

“Yuck Marmite”

“Sure honey”

Charlie leaves the bowl and walks into the living room, to sit on the sofa next to Kate.

“Look at this Charlie, they’re doing another Britain’s got talent”

“Joy”

“You think I could get on”

“And do what exactly?”

“Oh Charlie, don’t give me that look, I could so do it, I could sing and dance”

Kate pulls Charlie up from the sofa and proceeds to twirl him around the living room, holding him at arm’s length and singing right into his face.

“Leave me alone you bloody idiot child”

“Ooh you look sick, maybe dancing isn’t for you”

“I’m going to put dead things in your room while you’re asleep”

“Mum how’s the toast coming?”

“Here we go” Mrs Wilson replies, entering the room

Charlie sits back down on the sofa

“Budge up young man”

“You budge up; I was here first, fat a*s”

“See now there’s plenty of room”

“Can we change the channel, cartoons are so stupid, if that had been a real cat he would have caught that mouse years ago and we could all be done with it”

“Change it love, Charlie gets worked up when this is on”

“Damn right I get worked up, it’s the same with that bloody Tweetie-Pie and Sylvester”

“News please love”

“Mum...news is dull”

“Yeah well, Charlie and I like to watch the news, he always liked it.”

“Yeah before you came along ”

“Can I PLEASE have some of that toast?”

“No Charlie, if you want something to eat go and eat your healthy breakfast, it’s going to stay in that bowl until it’s eaten”

“But your food IS healthy, it’s jam, that’s fruit isn’t it?”

“Uch fine, but only a little bit”

Charlie takes a small bit of toast, and proceeds to lick the jam off

“He always does that, licks the jam off and then leaves soggy toast on the sofa, its gross!”

“It’s not harming you is it?”

“It does when I sit on it and don’t realise and the boys make fun of you at school”

“They make fun of you because you’re a dumb a*s idiot child”

“It’s eight-fifteen; you should get your shoes on”

Kate runs into the hall to fetch her shoes

“I should probably go check the mailbox”

“Yeah go”

“She never puts enough jam on”

Charlie gets off the sofa and climbs into the armchair in the corner

“Now presuming she sits where she was before...”

“Mum?” Kate calls as she puts her head around the door

Kate sits back in her place on the sofa to put her shoes on

“Charlie strikes again”

“Kate, the bus is here”

“Ok Mum”

Kate hurriedly gets up and runs out the door. Charlie gets out of the armchair and waves her goodbye. Watching as the soggy toast goes unnoticed stuck to the back of a freshly laundered, school skirt.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Jessica M.]

this was a truly enjoyable cynical read.
i have the feeling my cat would call me a dumbass too if he had a voice.
nice write.
:]