5 What happens if a car comes?

If a car drove by it would hit her before the driver would even see her.
Instant death.
"I didn't think you were coming anymore." she sits dead center in the dark black top at the bottom of the hill with her arms crossed,
but I can see the smile she is fighting off.

"Well I'm here"
"I can see that"

"what if a car had come along?"
"I would've died"
now she actually smiles, and I see for the first time the cigarette perched between her lips.
she snuffs it out in the gravel and looks at me.
I don't know where we go from here,
why we are here.
With a shrug she pulls something out of her bag.
Flashlight.
she thought this through I guess.
I hear the button click then her face is lit up from under her chin.
gruesome in a beautiful way.
setting the flashlight on the road for light she asks "Ever skateboarded?" I shake my head no.
"Well then it's you're lucky day."
She smiles again, picking up the board she had been sitting on.
"C'mon then I'll show you."
She grabs my hand and we run up to the highest part of the hill.
"This would be better with a long board of course but still"
"could I maybe just watch? Or at least start it out slow?"
"No"
I like how there isn't any stalling with her.
How she is secure in knowing what to do.
and then does.
And right now,
holding hands like this.
I do it with her.
and it feels like I am more secure.
"I don't have such good balance..."
"Just wait.
Now sit down and I'll hold it."
Oh this looks bad.
"This is a pretty big hill Brinn, I don't know--"
"Just once, okay?
if you decide you hate it afterwards you never have to do it again."
I really don't know.
What if I fall.
what if I bleed.
I don't know.
"plleeaasse"
She smiles.
I sit down.
her smile gets wider.
A piece of wood with plastic little wheels.
I'm going to die.
I am going to start speeding up and I will freak out trying to stop and I'm going to die of some sort of head injury.
"okay now I'm going to sit down too so move a bit."
wait.
what.
Before I know what to do she is pressed next to me.
I'm on fire.
I was wrong, she is not cold.
maybe we are just too close.
I don't know where I end and she begins.
Maybe If we were a little farther apart, Just an inch or too.
maybe my heart would stop beating so hard.
Maybe I am having a heart attack.
could that happen?
"Okay now I'm going to hold us so we don't start rolling. you bring your feet up.
okay?"
Okay.
I do.
"Okay here we go."
Oh no.
Oh no oh no oh no.
"ONE.
TWO"
"wai-" I don't like this. but I do....
"THREE"

All at once she pushes off and wraps her arms and legs around my waist.
I barely notice how fast we go.
"WOOA!"
she screams laughs and it sounds infinite.
she rocks the sleeping world with the sound of her laughter and her skateboard speeding over the pavement.
I do not know if I want to scream or laugh or cry.
I know we are pressed closer then I have ever been.
I know how fast we are going now.
and I am scared.
I am so f*****g scared right now.
but next to her.
it doesn't matter.
 
faster, faster,
why can the hill not last forever?
it doesn't and we slow down.
slower, slower,
stop.
It's over.


she leans over my shoulder.
and it is then I that I realize how tense I was.
"Well?" she whispers.
"Again" I say breathlessly.


She shows me wild tricks that send chills up my spine.
First a 'basic ollie' then a 360 ollie'
then ' Hospital flips',
next something called a 'Shuv-it sexchange.
Then 'lasers'
and a few more but I forget the names.
"Wanna try?" she says simply, like it is easy.
"No...not ever thanks."
I would die.
"just you wait stick with me and you'll be doing this--first you're going to bleed a lot. but gain requires sacrifice."
'Stick with me'
I'm stuck.



the sun is coming up.
The sun is up,
It's Saturday now.
No school, If we go home now neither of us will see each other until Monday.
That is a sad thought.
years of never seeing her not knowing she existed, and thinking about not seeing her for such a sort time makes me very sad.

we stopped skating an hour ago. Since then we've lied in the road listening to her Ipod.
my back hurts and I feel that I'm about to pass out. but it has been wroth it
I was so surprised to find out we like the same bands songs.
we both agree the band is the creator but the song is the world, and the world is what we walk on.
she said that.
I agreed.
no cars have came by yet.
but they will be waking up now.
"happy Saturday" I smile,
"F**K, HOLY F*****G S**T, s**t, s**t! what time is it??"
She sits up and freaks out when she checks her phone.
"S**t I've really got to go."
"Can you maybe come to my house tomorrow?"
she frowns
"or any time?"
I'm pushing my luck but I am not ready for this to end.
"no I really can't.
I'm already really late"
what could she be doing at 8am?
"Please" I should not guilt her, I should respect that she has to leave.
I should don't.
"Please"
I say again.
Is she is lying because she has had enough of me?
If she is I want to make her stay.
I want her to want to stay.

she stares at me hard.
If looks could kill I don't know what this one would do.
"Please."
I must sound so desperate to her, but the truth is, I am.

three times is the charm.
"OH F**K IT."
she smiles dangerously.
"I DON'T CARE ANYMORE"
she screams at the sky.
A car honks at us and she flips them off, grabs her bag, slings it over her shoulder, grabs my hand, I grab the skateboard and then we run because she never walks.
because we are young alive and together.
because we can.