Frosten Attraction

A brush with Death

Death came in eyes of diamonds 

Upon hills of rolling snow,

While the grass slumbered in frost

Amid the season’s stunt to grow.

He dripped in frozen flowers 

All breaking about his black dress,

The sweetness of passing about his hand;

Death and bloom motionless.

Let me to love the crystalline being

Who mourned the shattered petals so still,

That I may lie in biting beauty

In his winter garden of rolling hills.

Author's Note

Ah, symbolism. Gotta love it

Reviews

[Augustus]

I have a weakness when it comes to reviewing poetry. I am invariably attracted to works which exude elegance. And this verse is elegance personified. The lines are soaked in surreal euphemism. The photograph accompanying the poem could not have been more apt. I can't help but notice that you have mastered imagery at a very young age. The fact that you begin your poem with "Death came in eyes of diamonds" is proof enough.

"While the grass slumbered in frost
Amid the season’s stunt to grow"
These lines are enchanting in their solemn beauty.

"He dripped in frozen flowers" is nothing short of sublime. Winter, that angel of Death, is surrounded by his own handiwork. The "sweetness of passing" delicately portraying the flowers' imprint on this world.

"Death and bloom motionless" is epic in it's profundity.

While the second stanza is more descriptive, the third one is contemplative. The poet feels attracted to winter, because winter is not cruel. He "mourned the shattered petals so still". Winter has an enigmatic beauty, because the frozen petals indicate no malice on winter's part. The phrase "biting beauty" say it all, really. Indeed, if Death is to take all, may we all die this way, and the sweetness of our passing be remembered.

Masterfully done, yet again! You have my utmost respect, Hayley. Keep writing!

[Derek S.Keck]

Haley, I can't tell you how much your work influences me. You never post something that isn't utterly brilliant, and i mean that with the utmost serenity. There is this careful meditative quality to your writing; your poetry shows that you search the world with the most careful vision, so to pull out the best possible understanding of things that may never be completely understood. You always wade out a little further into the water than anyone else.

I have to say Shreyas(Augustus) is pretty spot on. I think the two lines that i keep batting back and forth in my mind are in your second stanza, when you state: “The sweetness of passing about his hand;/Death and bloom motionless." You seem to draw very nicely between nature and death, but beyond that, the quality of death that IS nature. There is such an acceptance of death within nature, there’s no struggle, no bitter resentment, no apologies, no regrets. Things just simply are and then they're not. Yet, death leads into rebirth, things fall to death and things bloom in their place, and it’s the beautiful way of things. You have a hint of Robert Frost in you, but your work stands out separately from anyone I’ve ever read. I can't tell you how beautiful I find this poem.

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

The way I read it I see this as love gone bad... if so I must say that is some creative metaphors... especially the frozen flowers.

[.........]

The last stanza seems to be where you reveal the most. "That I may lie in biting beauty In his winter garden of rolling hills".... You seem to be letting go of the idea that winter is a bad thing, but that it merely exists, and that memories pass without the control of the person. I wouldn't quite say the poem is depressing, but merely an acceptance of a frozen world. "Upon hills of rolling snow" makes me think that it doesn't quite leave, though progress moves alongside time, but the snow still exists and it moves with your life. You seem more comfortable with ideas, "That I may lie in biting beauty In his winter garden..." Like an acceptance type of thing. "Death came in the eyes of diamonds"- can it be that death has beauty in it at all? You have found the good in the lost.

[Lily Mae]

I loved reading this.. and your right the symbolism left my mind wondering and wandering lol...xxx

[Erinne S.]

Wow this was great! I absolutely loved the vivid descriptions you gave, it left a chilling mark on me as the reader. Loved it!

[Seshat Nidaba]

Divine, the 3rd stanza wasn't as sublime as the first 2, but it's pretty near perfection.

I like it when you have a very tight, well-defined and specific theme, - I think it suits your style to have such.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Beautiful and chilling...like the winter sky this evening.

[Thomas Fitzgerald]

Perfectly flowed, altogether a good write, however imagery is key in this kind of piece, I would rather see mroe of this from you!

[joshua deathdealer]

This is amazing. I love this poem..xx