Scarlet

My childhood was filled with scarlet thoughts.

When I was young, the world seemed beautiful in a child's point of view

Everything was wonderful, every thing was new

I lived here in this beautiful expanse of my mind

Glorious and divine

This was until, I discovered what was inside

It was the day the kids pushed me down

A rivulet of scarlet came pouring out of my body

It had been a sunny day, but suddenly, it was all dark

When i woke up they said everything would be good and fine

That day i realized that people lie

People are cruel

The next revelation came when a girl called me fat

She said i was hideous, that i should hide in a paper bag

She hoped that i died

The sad thing was, i almost did

I came home to the knife drawer, the intoxicating thought of that beautiful scarlet coming back after all these dry years

I raised my tool, and carved at my stomach I was finally thin enough

I saw the scarlet again, more beautiful than ever, a waterfall cascading down my shaking body

Over those years, the scarlet always came back, always more beautiful after every slit

They thought i was crazy

They thought i was depressed, insane even

They thought i hated myself

They don't know that i love who i am, whats inside of me.

My scarlet.

Author's Note

Im sorry if this bothers anyone, or if you've gone through this. Please know that you are loved and anyone would be lucky to help you. Please give your thoughts on this : )