Carnival Lights

I sat upon my windowpane

gazing at the moon.

The streets were filled with carriages like

the bustle of high noon.

The carnival below me was

a masquerade of lights,

the streetlights breaking through the dark

and illuminating the sights.

As gentle as a whisper

someone called out my name.

I looked below and saw no one,

but I had heard it, all the same.

“Jean, Jean, come find me.

I promise I won’t hide.

If you come down to the carnival

I’ll take you to the other side.”

I donned my coat and mask

and raced down flights of stairs

out into the carnival

with people with no cares.

I looked around and heard the voice.

“Jean, Jean, come quick.”

It turned into a quiet whisper,

a laughing little mimic.

Curiosity took hold of me

and would not let me go.

Though I knew it was not wise,

I turned to follow it far from home.

The voice led through whispers

down a dark and twisting street.

It was far from the fairy lights

and there was no one there to meet.

Finally the voice stopped

and turned to me to say,

“I have you in my grasp now

and you cannot get away.”

There was a screech of metal,

piercing to the soul.

I refused to let out me screams

or play my dreadful role.

Then there was a bark of laughter

and the voice was no longer a mystery.

I looked up to the face of

my dear friend Nathalie.

She laughed at me and said,

“My, I gave you a fright.

But come, that is over,

let’s go find the carnival lights.”

We turned and walked

back towards the pixie fair.

Laughing at our previous scene,

we made quite a happy pair.

But something was wrong.

She had an air of danger.

A blindly led cause that

I didn’t fear to anger.

As we turned

she stabbed my side,

and I fell down

in the bloody tide.

Then she whispered in my ear,

“Have no fear, you will be safe.

You’ll be with our shared beloved

who I knew too late.”

As I succumbed

to the never-ending night,

I looked back and saw

the sweet carnival lights.

Author's Note

It's kinda long, I know, but it was just so boring at school today =)

Reviews

[Mauricio Montoya]

I can relate to this piece, a few years back I once was a Carney on the midway reading this write took me to those days of the flashing lights and the blaring tunes that would fit the occasion but times have change and now its brought forth another element, violence. Sometimes poems need to be long in order to get the massage across. I think you’ve done a great job in putting this together.
Excellent write.

[Tate Morgan]

Very nice Surprising though as a one who commits to perfection to have so many lines with different numbers of syllables in them

[Moonflower]

Very well done, I believe that this could be a very amazing piece with a little bit of editing.

[David W Moore III]

A little dark. I love the carnival metaphor. The world is a carnival that we wear many masks for when we step out of our abode. Some masks are scary. Sometimes instead of the carnival of lights , we end up in cirque du freak as Jean did here. Well written.

[Naomi Montana Walsh]

I remember when I was as young as you writing my way through a boring class you learn alot when writing.. and it's an interesting write

[black.butterfly]

simply beautiful and your 15!! good write. :)

[Looouise]

I'm amazed. Nuff said.
I thought that was pretty damn good. Not even kidding. I haven't been on here in quite a while, and the other writing site I'm on, Mibba - doesn't quite have the poems we find on here.
I miss seeing these poems.
I think you rekindled my love just a little bit.

That was amazing. :]

[Bella-Marie]

It's a beautiful poem! How could you say it's long?! I love the length. You wrote this so beautifully, tres bien, ka pai.