Chapter 18

 

        He was right, it was what I wanted. But why did it hurt so much? Over the course of the break, I thought about apologizing to him for the way I acted, but I could never bring myself around to doing it. It was probably better this way anyway. Maybe by now he wouldn't bother me? It would make getting over this crush much easier without him trying to be around me all the time, and then I would be able to carry on with other things. No matter how much I tried to tell myself this though, it still pained me.

        The rest of the school year rolled by somewhat slowly. Jack and I barely talked anymore. If I ever saw him in the hall, I tried to hide myself in the crowd or go the opposite way so I wouldn't have to worry about talking to him. Even when I did this though, the crush never seemed to go away. My heart screamed at me for the way I was acting, but as the days progressed, it became a little more easier to ignore.

        When summer break came, I still didn't see Jack as much anymore. However, he sometimes called me. I often thought about just hanging up, but my hands just wouldn't cooperate with my brain—like they had a mind of their own. Surprisingly, it didn't seem to be as nerve-wracking to be talking to him on the phone like it used to be. It seemed I was just beginning to finally get rid of my crush.

        Talking on the phone was all we really did though. Jack hardly had any time to hang out, and it was probably better off that way. If we started to hang out again, my crush would probably only return, and I didn't want to have to go through that pain again. I mean, the feelings still lingered, but they weren't as strong as what they were during the second half of the school year.

        It was now the summer and the next school year would be starting in a couple days. The sun was setting in the horizon. I was sitting in the woods that sat next to the field, watching the somewhat fast current of the river. My mind felt a little blank and my life seemed to be bleak. It had always appeared to be that way ever since I yelled at Jack in the nature trail.

        Several seconds later, I faintly heard footsteps on the path that led down to the river. I didn't bother turning my head to see who it was.

        “Something told me I would find you here.”

        Jack stopped beside me. I glanced up to see him staring out at the river. He didn't seem to be as enthused like he always was before. It was kind of sad. . .

        “Is it alright if I sit down?” he asked.

        “Go ahead, I won't bother trying to stop you,” I replied a little quietly.

        He sat down. The sound of the current was the only sound that was made as we stared out at the river.

        Jack sighed several seconds later. “There's something I need to tell you.”

        I looked over towards him. There was a small bit of hope that seemed to be reborn, but it was feeble. I knew better than to even bother getting my hopes up about something like that. It would only cause me pain in the end.

        “What?” I asked emotionlessly as I looked back out at the river.

        “I'm not going to be going to school here anymore,” he began. “I'm going to some academy down in Georgia.”

        I don't know why, but my heart seemed to stop when I heard the news.

        “It seems to be a good place,” he continued. “It will really help my future.”

        For something that was good, he didn't seem to be too excited about it. I didn't say anything though, but instead nodded as my eyes slowly lowered to the ground in front of me. There was a few seconds of silence.

        “I'll be leaving by plane tomorrow at noon to head down there.” There was another brief moment of silence. “Is there anything you want to tell me before I leave?”

        “Why would you think that?”

        “I don't know, just wondering I guess.”

        We didn't say anything for about ten seconds.

        “Did you want me to go?” he asked.

        “That's completely your choice,” I replied, a small bit of bitterness in my voice. “I mean, why should I even bother trying to stop you?”

        “Right,” he said, barely loud enough for me to hear. “Well, I guess I'll go then. Not like there really seems to be much else for me here anyway.” There was a bit of anger in his voice when he said the last sentence.

        “Yeah, I guess there isn't.” The anger rose in my voice. Why was I getting worked up over this? Not like we really talked or hung out anymore anyway. . .

        “Not that you probably even care anymore!” he yelled as he got to his feet. “I probably just wasted my damn time trying to tell you anyway!”

        “Yeah, maybe you did!” I snapped back as I looked up at him furiously. “Just go! See if I give a damn!”

        Jack didn't say anything else, but instead turned around and stormed off. I didn't bother trying to stop him. I didn't care. I looked back at the river, trying to get myself to calm down, but it just wouldn't work. After about half a minute, I couldn't stand sitting around there anymore and decided to head back home.

        When I got there, I locked myself in my room and sat down on my bed, sighing angrily. I looked towards my nightstand to see the old Bionicles figure. I reached over and picked it up. As I fidgeted with it, the memories of our friendship poured into my mind.

        “Damn it!” I cursed a few seconds later as I chucked the toy. It crashed into the wall and a few of its pieces broke off. I didn't care though as I laid down on my bed and curled up. Tears of anger and sadness started to roll down my face as I stared into nothingness. A knocking came at my door a couple seconds later.

        “Jay, is everything okay in there?” my mother asked from outside of it.

        “Yeah,” I replied, concealing my feelings. I didn't want to talk to anyone right now.

        There wasn't another response and I just laid there. I ended up crying myself to sleep that night.

Author's Note

Is the dialogue okay?

Reviews

[Mekin]

Haha, you're going to ask that every chapter? Well, it seems that Jack and Jay are in th same book, but not one the same page. They're blindly missing each other and ultimately misunderstanding one another. I'm glad to see little development in Jack's character. Though I can't say the same for Jay. He seems to still have too much pride and continues to restrict himself from taking risk(s). The fight between the two males was....a bit odd to me. Holding a resentment towards Jack over something he did once (dancing with another female) is not a very good reason. His grudge is driven by jealously and confusion about his own feelings - hint: referring Jack as just a crush. I understand that Jack wanted to get something out of Jay, a confession, however Jay must've took it the wrong way. Thus, the dialogue of the fight is pretty good - but, I feel that it needed more of a feeling. Since the relationship between them is sketchy, the fight would've been more extensive. Thus, ending with someone walking off. Good Work. :3