Hymns of my mind

All I hear is a lullaby some song in my head a voice that I do not recall. The words in a way are horrifying. Feeling flood my mind and the little hole in my heart seems to open a bit wider. I wish I could forget the voice. As I was a boy the hymns didn't seem to call out. Sound of rains as the voice trickles though remind me of day gone by. Like a loins roar every drop the pitch of that voice echoes though my darkness. Where does it stop? Still forgetting myself in the past yet left in wake of my being. That song… that beautiful lullaby it haunts me. Where does it come from? For me it’s a simpler time, its that heart breaking all over again. Curiously… wanting… yearning… just let me escape. When I see her in my dreams, in the day as a random person, a ghost, a shadow this is when she sings the loudest. The words are ever clear as to what she is saying but the way she uses her voice. The timeless melody it’s as if the song was might to sing for the stars. Yet its only in my mind. Those far recesses in the cracks bleeding though as if it a taunting me. I can try and hind for it but it’s me. This accursed lullaby I only wish it did not make me cry.