For Just A Little While

For Just A Little While

 

Look at me

With your eyes so blue

Look at me

Let me talk with you

 

Do you see the fire?

As the embers begin to grow?

Look at me and caress me with your smile.

If not for a long time, then just a little while.

 

Touch me,

             Hold me,

                         Caress me.

 

Quick......capture my heart to thee.

For then I shall feel the beating of your heart.

Right next to mine.

For now that will be just enough.

To know that they beat as one for just a little while.

Is far better than none

Reviews

[HarmonyMae]

Thank you Dickey and Lilac.

[Lilac]

Beautiful expression. To share one moment together is better than not at all.
'Thee' is out of place with the use of you and your so much throughout. Stick with the modern vernacular and it sounds better :)

[Dickey Harrold]

I'm not a poet but it lacked rhyme and flow. You started great.
"Look at me
With your eyes so blue
Look at me
Let me talk with you" - you had me going.

Them came -
Do you see the fire?
As the embers begin to grow?
Look at me and caress me with your smile.
If not for a long time, then just a little while.

Do yo see the fire,
as embers begin to grow.
Express your desire,
Let your feelings flow.

I don't know. just my opinion as a song writer. Rhyme and syllable cout is the basics of poetry. However, poetry is written in all forms of grammar. You did direct me to where you were going, just would you have taken me to the end.