A Life in Two Moments

 

gaze torn across the battlefield

he saw her

alive, his lover, going fast

he himself writhed in pain

he stared, as she lay there

beautiful

until...

 

one year earlier

he remembered the night

parents bedroom

her lip caressed the underside of him

so he decided to burst early

she drove deeper and deeper

with each passing stroke

until finally ...

 

she died

Reviews

[Not Afraid of Bruises]

really strong emotions moving through the lines with a great sense of flow. Good write and best of luck

[Robert Luna]

"her saw her" ***he saw her***

I loved the flow and the story that seemed to lay there in between the words. There is a deeper story line here that seems to be a tale of sadness and woe. I like that you left this for our imaginations to ponder about. Really well done as I am asking myself what could have happened.

Great Job!!!!!!