Inadequate

I know you care,

But not as I do;

I care for you.

 

You are my shelter from the rain,

But your ceilings are too high.

Can’t patch you up

When cracks start to surface.

The pain trickles in.

 

You caught me once

In my heavenly plunge,

But I spy a trail of feathers.

Can’t lift the weight from your shoulders,

That bends your bleeding wings.

 

Every time you pick up my pieces,

While I slip with fumbling fingers

When we break, like we do.

Yet you love me,

But not as I do;

I’m in love with you.

Author's Note

Please let me know any thoughts you had about this poem down in the comments!

Reviews

[RAOrourke]

You are my shelter from the rain, love this opening line, tells so much to the reader right off the bat! Nice job!!
When cracks start to surface.
The pain trickles in. Perfectly described. The pain one feels when love is more one sided! Wonderful job!

[H McG]

Thanks very much!

[FateDictates]

wow inspired piece of work..beautiful and a slam dunk ending...

[ksscampos]

I enjoyed this.. great job with the metaphors..

[H McG]

Thank you :)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

I love free verse poetry… and you do it so very well…
Yes there is a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. Well done.

[H McG]

Thanks very much for your comment :) I'm glad you liked my take on the concept

[The Rock And Roll Cowboy(REBEL WITH A CAUSE)]

My pleasure young lady.

[JC]

ah the complications of life and love put so well into poetic form. enjoyed reading this, made me remember and think of my past and present.

[H McG]

Thank you very much! And yes it's tough- I think we've all been there.

[Chris]

Interesting choice of descriptors and an aware understanding of the differences in shades of meanings

[H McG]

Thanks very much!

[Awakened Rose]

Wooooowwwwww! The ending is so memorizing. And this "You are my shelter from the rain,
But your ceilings are too high." Just wow. Your words are a delight to the senses. Seriously. Such a good poet!

[H McG]

Thanks for the lovely words! I really appreciate it.

[Dark Heart of Winter]

beautiful... i find myself in the same situation of unequal love except i'm the one who's distant

[H McG]

Thank you. And that's really interesting- I never thought about what it's like to be the person on the other side of this poem. I've been there too, but I never thought about it in this context.

[Dark Heart of Winter]

its an interesting conundrum alright... i have reasons to love her less than i used to (or, i think i do.. who knows...) but it makes me feel sad that our love is unequal. You can't force love, though. I'm not blind to my own weaknesses or my unfairness, but I never learned to forgive; and i think she's finally grown tired of me and the whole thing is fading away altogether.

[Reina Stone]

It is sad when love is felt differently between two people, isn't it? Nice articulation. The differences between being in love, and loving someone are few but I could probably talk about it endlessly.

[H McG]

Yes I agree that the difference between those two types of love is so important and thank you very much for this lovely review.

[Reina Stone]

You're welcome hun. Write on