The Mact Of The Fatter

My take on reality

It’s time to talk about facts and reality, but really only the important kinds, namely mine. Although we all have our own reality, the fact is, my reality could kick your reality’s backside. Incidentally, the word “reality” originally comes from the Nielsen TV ratings guide, meaning, “face lift fake b***s”.

 

Other folks who don’t ever go outside have defined the word “reality” as “the state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear or may be thought.” So, in its broadest definition, reality includes everything that is or has ever been, whether or not it is observable or comprehensible or incomprehensibly reprehensible, and other massive words that end in -le.

 

Yet, reality is different to each person. And to each person’s reality can be added side dishes, like truth, lies, and a helping of fantasy for a dollar more. Outside forces also serve to influence individual reality. For some, a healthy dose of sunshine makes their darker reality a little better. For others, particularly those with a raging skin allergy, a bit of sunshine seems a little like hell during a high colonic heat wave. But this is the kind of reality we can actually see, feel and itch. 

 

Reality on an individual basis is subjective and can personally change by the nanosecond. I may wake up after a poor night’s sleep feeling pretty low sometimes, but after eight massive morning coffees, believe I am the cleverest, best-looking fellow around. In the evening, one piece of chocolate cream pie can turn a personal psychotic episode replete with suicidal tendencies involving sharp objects and bleach into a self absorbed slumber party of happy happy bliss on a “Howdy Doody” re-run sort of scale. So caffeine and sugar play a huge role in shaping my reality.  

 

Reality can also be different to folks who are observing the same thing at the same time. I can get one hundred people together and we will all agree the sky is blue, or some variation thereof, but throw a colorblind person in there to get their opinion, and that’s how wars start. Getting a hundred people to agree on anything is always a miracle, just ask the folks over at the U.N. 

 

Facts are different than reality. Wikipedia (the source of all knowledge far and wide) says that a “fact” means a “truth known by actual experience or observation; something known to be true.” But it seems to me that that definition is itself subjective. 

 

Just because someone believes something doesn’t make it fact. That’s why so much in life must be taken on faith. For example, I have faith that my brakes won’t fail as I drunkenly follow an out-of control and deliriously flammable oil tanker at 70 miles an hour down the wrong side of the freeway. I have faith that the dog won’t throw up on the cat if I get home late from work a little later than usual.  

 

I can attest to a love for my children down to the chromosomal level, but I can’t prove it as fact. I can point out examples of that love, or attempt to demonstrate it, but the proving of something as nebulous and vaporous as love is elusive and mostly impossible. Indeed, the proving of anything can be difficult, except that all housecats reek. 

 

I gave my life to Christ many years ago, after being a borderline atheist for the first part of my life. This transformation came after a series of events that absolutely cemented in me a deep and abiding belief in Him. These events were monumental, even supernatural. But I can’t prove I believe in Him; my actions to and around others based on the true Christian ethic must demonstrate that belief. And I have failed that test more times than I care to discuss here. But His presence in my life is a fact for me. 

 

Let us pretend your best friend has just stolen your wife of twenty-five years. In light of this, you would remark, “As a matter of fact Carl, you’re an a-hole.” Most people would agree. However, to a fan of wife-stealing, the reality of your former friend’s action would be different. Someone else of that ilk might think it was cool that Carl stole your wife, so your remark that Carl is an a-hole would be invalid to them. It was a matter of fact only to you.

 

This fact business is really tenuous, factually. (See detailed graphic below)

 

And there are occasions in life when the use of simple facts won’t do, because sometimes facts can’t prove our point to our satisfaction. We need something a bit stronger; something I made up. I call it a “mact”. A mact is a fact with attitude, with hair on it, almost vile. If a mact doesn’t work when you’re trying to prove a point, just use a large weapon. 

 

Let me explain the difference between a mact and a fact. The reality that my credit card is maxed out is a “fact”. The fact that I can’t pay the minimum payment due this month is a “mact.” A fact sits in a bar and quietly nurses its drink, a mact gets in a fight with the bartender over the club soda. 

 

So the fact of the matter to you will be different for me. Does that mean I am more insightful than you? Yes. Does that mean your point of view will be any less valid than mine? Yes. But your point will be no less credible, even if you don’t have one (kind of like this essay) We all know the fact of the matter: But when we talk about the mact of the fatter, methinks things change considerably. What thinks you?