Speed Dating

Speed Dating.

Woman #1

"Hi, I'm Elise." she smiles.

"Clark." he sits down.

"Nice to meet you, Clark!"

"You don't know that yet. I might be the worst date you've ever had."

"I doubt it." she laughs, "what kind of accent is that?"

"Oh it's an acquired thing. We all speak like that in our child porn network."

Silence. A look of shock and disgust on her face.

"Told you."

Silence.

The bell rings after some minutes.

Woman #2

"Hey there! What's your name?" She smiles.

"What's yours?" He imitates her smile.

"I asked first." Her smile drops.

"Pyotr Mjolnich. Pleased to meet you."

She hesitates.

"Something wrong?"

"Uhh... no, I just..."

"So, what are your hobbies?"

"Um, I read. A lot. I mean I really ca-"

"That's really interesting, why don't you continue?"

"Yes, I was going to. So, my favorite author is Andrew Ferris. Do you know him?"

"Yes. He's my uncles brother."

"He's been dead for 130 years." she looks at him disappointed.

"So am I." he says while the bell rings.

Woman #3

"Hey." He sits down.

"Hi! I'm Sally."

"Clark."

Silence

"Nice weather, huh?" he says suddenly and with false enthusiasm.

"It's Vekta. There is no weather."

"You make a solid point."

Silence.

"I don't know how these things work. Never been to one." She laughs nervously.

"Oh really? I would never have guessed."

Silence.

The bell rings.

Woman #4

"Are you interesting?"

"What?"

"The last three really sucked the hope for humanity out of me. Are you interesting or can I move on?"

"I, uh, I..."

"Good talk."

He walks past her table and swaps places with another man.

Woman #5

"I just violated sacred law to sit with you." He sits down.

"Should I feel honored?"

"Tremendously."

"I've been watching you. You don't want to be here, do you?"

"My friend Shepard forced me here. He's the big black guy over there." He points to his friend.

"You didn't seem like friends when you walked in."
"That's because he's an annoying c**t."

"I see."

"So, nice weather, huh?"

"You really interested in small talk?"

"Honestly, I will leave this place with negative three contact numbers anyway. It's an annoying waste of my time, so I don't see the point of having a meaningful conversation with a stranger I will never see again. Might as well have a conversation about nothing at all."

"Don't be too sure about that first part."

The bell rings.

Woman #6

"Excuse me for a second" He goes back to the previous table and switches again.

Woman #5 again

"You'll be hanged if you keep defying your betters."

"I just liked this chair better."

"Sure, you did."

Silence.

"Why are you really here?"

"I told you, Shepard-"

"Oh come on. You're not the type of guy that is persuaded easily. You came here because you have some agenda."

He looks at her.

"Do you see that guy over there?" He nods his head in the direction of another date couple.

"Yes."

"What do you see?"

"Well... He has blond hair, he's tall-"

"I know what he looks like but what do you see?"

"Um... He has his hands folded, he's constantly wiggling his knee..."

"He's wearing a wedding ring, folds his hands so it's not visible. His shoes are expensive but dirty, the legs of his trousers are folded up a few times, probably to keep them out of the dirt he inevitably stepped into when he climbed out of his bedroom window. It's going to get unfair now because you can't possibly see this. His pupils are dilated and his heartbeat is well above normal. He's looking his date in the eyes, which means there's not much to see for him elsewhere, which means his pupils and heartbeat aren't caused by sexual arousal. There are no track marks on his arms, he's breathing freely through his nose and concentration isn't an issue, which means he's most likely not on drugs which means he's afraid of something. What could he be afraid of? Your turn."

"Well, his wife could find him here-"

He makes the sound of a 'wrong'-buzzer.

"His wife wouldn't suspect him to be here, if she knows anything, she will expect him to already have an affair."

"Okay, then he's afraid of something else. Maybe... I don't know."

"Bingo. Neither do I. Yet."

The bell rings.

He doesn't get up. A man approaches him.

"'Scuse me, the bell rang."

"I'm gonna stay here for another round."

"No, you're gonna leave the table and go to the next one, like everyone else."

"I really don't think so."

"I'm gonna go get the host."

"You have a pack of cocaine in your right pocket."

The man looks at him in shock.

"Don't sweat it, we all do it. Just keep walking."

The man walks on to the next table.

Woman #5 a third time

"You're good at this."

"Actually, I saw him take a pinch in the back alley before."

"Less impressive. How'd you know it was his right pocket?"

"He constantly fiddles with it. Junkies don't like losing their stuff, believe you me."

"Sounds like first hand experience."

"Something like that."

"Something like that?"

"Drama, baby." He nods his head again.

The man leaves his table and retreats into the corner of the room to take a phone call.

"You wanna try it again?"

"Well... He seems angry. His voice is trembling. He may just be-"

"Look at his hands."

"Clenching his fists."

"They're rough, have deep calluses. His fingernails are cut and groomed but he uses his hands for lots and lots of manual labor. The wedding ring he's wearing has a round cut diamond, at least two or three carats. His suit is also expensive but at the same time he's using an old flip phone. Dissonance. He probably lost his job or company recently and is hiding it from his family. On the phone must be his lawyer or maybe a declined application."

"Lots of speculation."

"Impossible to be more precise with the data I have. Why is he here? What does he stand to gain from a speed date?"

"Are you going to stay again?"

The bell rings.

"That almost sounds like you want me to."

"It's a story. I want to hear the end."

"Sure you do."

Woman #5 a fourth time

The man is now sitting at the table next to them.

He and she stare at each other in silence for several minutes. Then he picks up his glass of wine and unceremoniously pours it over the neighboring date's table.
"Oh boy, I'm terribly sorry. Let me get that for you."

She watches him clean up the mess with a towel.

"I'm so very sorry. Sometimes I get so clumsy. How can i make it up to you Mister..."

"Hill. Calvin Hill. And don't bother."

"Whatever you say."

He sits back down and starts typing something on his cellphone.

The bell rings.

Woman #5 for the last time

"Interesting methods."

"Calvin Hill. Former CEO of a major pharmaceutical company. He was voted out of his position and forced to sell all of his stocks."

"That would make him rich."

"That was six months ago. He was arrested multiple times since then for drunk driving and attempted casino fraud. He gambled away his money."

"But why is he here?"

"He was in the news eight times because of his affairs." He put away his phone, "When he hits a low in life, he needs a high in love. He loses control on one end and seeks to replace it on the other."

"That's so sad."

"Give me a break. He's a rich b*****d who finally reaped the fruits of his decades of ripping off sick and dying people. If there is one person in this room who doesn't deserve a shred of pity, it's him."

The bell rings. The host calls out that the event is closed.

"I never got your name."

"I never got yours."

He gets up.

"Good talk."

"Nice story."

He turns and leaves the restaurant.

Author's Note

Hi. Something different. A bit sherlocky. I hope you like it!
Feedback is much appreciated!

Reviews

[TheSecretWriter]

Yeah- a bit sherlock-y. But it is well written and not too over the top. Interesting setting- not too sure about Clark (?) himself but that was probably intended.