Crudelis Cupid

Love can be so unkind

again, this hallowed heart dare to stray

for a bliss left in the dustings of yesterday

Cupid's arrows, themselves, know love by no name

driven by taut string, callow hands, and an impetuous aim

a stricken heart is all too easily romanced

and the wretched step to a fleeting dance

from bow, through arrow, i curse love foul, by any other name

Author's Note

Not sure about this one. It's been in my notebook for a while, decided to post it. Your honest critique is welcome, thank you for reading.

Reviews

[icelandicblue]

I like this very much. It has such a Shakespearean vibe to it. I found these lines to be totally classic, as if transported from another time:


Cupid's arrows, themselves, know love by no name
driven by taut string, callow hands, and an impetuous aim

Seriously, you understand the language and its potency. Perchance a sonnet may be in your future.

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you, you continue to humble me. Actually, I must admit, the sonnet scares me as much as the Trijan Refrain once did. Being that I've just tackled the former, the latter may just be next. I would have to remember to credit you for the push if i do.

[Pryde Foltz]

Cupid's arrows, themselves, know love by no name
driven by taut string, callow hands, and an impetuous aim

Love is cruel. LOL. It's the aloof; they just happen to be the sexiest too. Loved the flow and word choice of the one.

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you, Pryde. Your words have me smiling from ear to ear.

[Jeannear]

very interesting piece...short and to the point, no need to be unsure about this one....I like it :)

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Jeannear]

your welcome....:)

[Yellow Butterfly]

This was wonderfully short and bitter sweet.... your uncertainty in your words are very humbling here Travis. You have a style unique to you.. be it in free verse, prose or rhyme. Which ever style you use I assure you you do it very well.

You have unearthed the darker side of love in your words...

You are truly a master of your craft Travis... and you just get better page by page..

YB

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you so very much... I wasn't to sure of this piece, I will be playing around with it's structure a little more. I can't begin to tell you how you have humbled me with your thoughts, they were missed during my absence.

[Rose Diamond]

Damn it! Why must you always leave me so speechless! The rhyming is fantastic, the theme is so real, dark and yet so often left in the dust, nobody wanting to dwell on the bitterness. The stanzas are perfect, and I adore the way make Cupid's arrows sound as though they are real, like they have a choice, like the can feel! Gah! This has definitely become a favourite of mine!

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Rosie, you truly are a huge encouragement. I can't thank you enough for how high you continue to set my ability. I appreciate your wonderful thoughts so much more than I can say.

[Lyn Anderson]

I like it. Really, the only change I can see making is breaking up the lines to have a smoother flow - but that may be my own personal bias, so feel free to try it on and take it off if you don't like it.

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Not sure how you mean... though it doesn't follow any specific meter, there was a rhyme scheme i attempted to create. lol Please do inbox the suggest, when/if you find the time of course. Thank you for your honesty, its greatly appreciated.

[Lyn Anderson]

okay will do

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you, my good friend.