The Death of a Song

when i realized it failed

i play note after note

and nothing

i tell my fingers to move slower... softer

and still... nothing

i beg my instrument to give me more notes

still... you don't move

i command the music to bow to my will

and it moves you not

so i play on...

my ears begin to ache---

i stand until my legs have forgotten

what movement is

the tips of my fingers are crimson

from the coursing blood that is binding them

to the instrument that i play

still no affect...

so i dig deeper---

cause i know somewhere,

i have what it takes to move you...

i am prepared to play this song

for as long as it takes you to come to me,

or til i can play it no more---

don't you remember this song?

we onced danced to it

you were easily romanced by it's notes

how could you now

be so immune to it's chorus---

this instrument i hold has aged,

but it still sounds good to me

so, why won't you move?

is it the song... my instrument---

is it... me

am i the blame?

please, just don't stand there

can't you here it?

this is OUR song...

why doesn't it move you anymore?

i am doing all that i can

to keep this song alive

but, no matter how loud i play

its as if this song is already dead to you

my instrument...

its beginning to crack under the pressure

so i grip it tighter

in an attempt to totally control it's chords

and make the song... listen to me

i'm trying so hard to make you listen

i know no longer recognize

the song that i play---

it's twisted notes are unfamiliar to my fingers

and alien to my ears

then it happens...

under the weight of my own obsession

the instrument shatters

and with it, dies the song that only we shared

it's notes forever lose--- remnants of a time

that is no longer present

but, how could this have come to pass?

i was told my instrument would survive anything

and could conquer all

so why has it failed me?

why now...

i refuse to believe that our song has ended

because without it, beauty is gone from me

and apathy now knows my name---

a song that was once so grand

is now cursed in memory...

it's notes haunting me till i welcome my final hour

how could i have been so absorbed by that song,

that i became numb to its purpose?

and i never noticed the moment...

you stopped listening

 

 

Author's Note

This piece was written at a very low point in my life. My ex-wife and i had seperated, this piece is a reflection of my thoughts during that period. Thank you for reading.

Reviews

[Cool Handless Luke]

t's notes haunting me till i welcome my final hour
how could i have been so absorbed by that song,
that i became numb to its purpose?
and i never noticed the moment...
you stopped listening

i can relate to this one well travis. you did a wonderful job of expressing even some of my own perspective. i can definitely feel this one!

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you, it was a stress filled write for me, i'm glad it is still relatable.

[Rogue]

This is very gripping, Travis. Very emotional and heartwrenchin as it builds through to the end. Watching things slowly fall apart word by word and there is naught that one can do.
But there is beauty here as well.. In the way you worded it and the feelings that come out of it as it is read.

Exceptional piece. :)

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you so much for those kind words. I always value your opinion. I've always thought it was a bit choatic, due to my state of mind while writting it. Not to mention, I've only read it myself a few times. I'm glad to know it comes across accurately to the reader.

[Vincent Moore]

I to have struggled with loss, two failed marriages should have told me something right? I bled and shed tears especially for my last wife, yet I knew the course had been run, there was no turning back, we both were moving on. But the biggest loss of all was my children, she was determined to keep them from their father and many a day and night I wept. So my guitar sits idol as well, and when I do pick it up, her body caresses my soul and I lay my fingers to her neck and I pick her slender strings to find that lost song that reminded me of my exes. Divorce can be an ugly story and legacy to leave behind.

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Yes, it absolutely can be. We live, learn, and even through the pain, have to be thankful we've loved.

[Coyote Poetry]

I like the use of the instrument and music to make your point.
"i refuse to believe that our song has ended
because without it, beauty is gone from me"
Hard when something that was once good become lost and can't be found again. Thank you for sharing the outstanding poetry.
Coyote

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you, Coyote... you always make me feel accomplished with your reviews. I appreciate you reading/reviewing my work, and giving encouraging words.

[s y e]

A really emotional piece, dude but really well written.

Good job, as always.

~ Noodle. ツ

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

You are too kind... thank you, Noodle.

[Sirius King]

love this, especially the last line...emotional piece

great write!

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thanks, bro... i appreciate the great review, i'm glad you enjoyed it.

[Rita L. Sev]

Wonderfully written metaphor - the song in another's heart that once was all we could hear... your last line says so much. Your write your feelings so well.

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you so much for the great review, Rita. This piece is a bit choatic, was more venting vs. telling a story. In spite of that, I'm glad the message is in there clearly.

[Shaun Payton]

Moving piece. The instrument of emotions and the heart...What we think will last forever, and we dont know will change. Nice poem, probably could tighten it up a bit.

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thanks, Shaun i appreciate your review and insight. I'll give editing a shot, it was more of a venting to keep from melting down kind of write. At the time, my heart was so heavy and i could only talk to the blank pieces of paper.

[Shaun Payton]

Yeah I do understand that venting. Paper dont judge.

[Peter H]

i liked it and it was very emotionally driven but i think it became redundant in certain lines you could tweak it somewhat my friend but nevertheless good poem i felt the pain in this

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thanks for reviewing it, Peter. This was one of my more emotional writes, I've read it about 3 times since writing it. Hopefully, I have the courage now to sit down and face it enought to edit it.

[SyberRose]

A sad piece...people change...life is full of changes...but hopefully a new song will be created with
someone else...btw I listened to madonna reciting Do not forget me...it was really beautiful...Rose

[Travis Gibson (poetic heroics)]

Thank you for the endearing words, Rose. I'll have to look on the net for that and give it a listen.