In Reality I Know

In reality I know, I know that to suffer great joy one has to suffer great pain. 

            To be lost in a moment, to truly allow that unrestrained joy of the pleasure that can only come from sharing completely all that is you, will most assuredly have a very high price.  It is a toll that will not be forgiven and will, in the end have its due.  It is the nature of things to have both light and dark and it does not matter our age, race, religion or wealth.  We as humans are driven to find others with whom we can connect, someone in whom we can share both our joys and sorrows.   In the end, this leads to great joy, that unexplainable bliss that may only last for the briefest of moments, a fragment that we can hold onto for a lifetime.  For me it is like the perfect sunset, when the heavens turn a sort or tangerine and crimson while reaching down to gently touch the sea.  The waves undulating from unknown sources, rolling in reaching the shores and gently licking at my feet; it is the feel of the sand as the water returns to her home taking just a few fragments of her journey with her.  It is the feeling of sinking into the depths of the mother as the waves return, pulling, tugging, and coaxing you to stay just a little longer.  The moment that defies an explanation when you truly, honestly feel that you are connected, a part of something larger than yourself and for just that moment, a flicker in time; peace reigns within your soul and all is still.  Then you grab onto that moment, and hold it for all it is worth, breathing in every nuance until it becomes a part of you; giving freely all that it asks of you. 

When you notice it is gone, you are left alone in a sea of darkness, alone on a cold deserted beach waiting; alone and waiting for another moment like the last.  The fiery heavens have abandoned you for a moonless night sky; clouds hang low blocking any hope of stars to light your way.  The sea which only seconds ago appeared to be your friend now is angry and dark, threatening to swallow you.  The sands which held you as a babe in its mother’s arms now pull hard, dragging you down into unknown depths.  The same place, the very same things that had given you such peace have now become a suffocating box closing in upon you as the sea rises to meet you, the sand reaches out to grab you and the heavens leave their celestial home bearing down to smother  you.  The gentle warmth that was once the sun is now replaced with a bitter cold; it bites through you, chilling your soul.  As you fight; the elements only seem to mock you, laughing at your feeble attempts to claw from this self imposed prison. 

Something within you breaks, a resounding tremor quakes through your body rendering you helpless.  It is at this moment and non other, when there is nothing left to give, nothing left to take, that you decide to offer yourself up to all that has come before you and all that is yet to come.  The sands reach out yet again with gentle arms comforting you, the sea rises slowly, carefully up to you and the heavens lay upon you like a warm blanket.  Peace and stillness finally reign within, amid the chaos that is your soul.

Reviews

[A. Amos]

you open your heart, mind and soul...invited your readers to know you better...pure magic

[Matthew Kult]

An interesting look into your insight. Thank you for sharing.


Regards,

Matthew